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OFF LIMITS

Dem bones: Longshot Democratic gubernatorial candidate Frank Arteaga wanted to make a statement when he staged a marathon walk to Denver from his residence in distant Trinidad earlier this month. Instead, the candidate--who's taking on incumbent Roy Romer despite never having held elective office--wound up dead by the side of the road.

At least that's what a passing motorist told police after he spotted Arteaga's apparently lifeless form sprawled near the intersection of I-25 and I-225 in Aurora. Actually, the exhausted candidate had stopped to take a rest and fallen asleep on the shoulder. "I was tired," says Arteaga, a self-described publisher and photographer who, having not yet geared up his fundraising apparatus, camped out in homeless shelters on his journey north.

After waking up, the footsore Arteaga truly ran for office, jogging the last two miles into Denver so as not to keep the numerous Denver reporters he'd alerted to his pending arrival waiting. Alas, the Denver Post, Rocky Mountain News and Channel 4, among others, didn't turn out to hear his plan for revitalizing the southern Colorado economy.

"They're all asking for something different," complains Arteaga of media pundits such as Ken Hamblin--a man he hoped would appreciate his status as an anti-gun-control Democrat. "Here I am, and they don't show."

More magic media moments: Maybe Hamblin was too busy answering all the queries prompted by the ad hyping his column that appeared on the back page of Editor & Publisher, the weekly publishing trade magazine. "Some may cheer him, some may curse him. But he will not go unnoticed," says the New York Times Syndicate ad. Among those who have noticed Hamblin, the ad says, is--what a coincidence!--the New York Times, which lauded his "wicked zest."

The fickle finger of fate landed squarely on the Denver Post on April 17, when Marvin Freeman was offered up as one of the "Hot Rocks to Watch." Freeman, the paper noted, "won't play second fiddle to anyone"--and proceeded to prove it with a full-page color photo of the pitcher pretending to play a violin. In an apparent salute to what the lanky hurler thought of the artistic concept, Freeman displayed some unusual fiddle fingering: a raised middle digit that later raised blood pressures at the paper.

Lovely shot of Magic Johnson's gum wad on the cover of the Wednesday Rocky Mountain News--in gag factor, it was topped only by Jay Ambrose's gender-enlightened editor's note on Friday, which reported that his five-year-old granddaughter would "wear her prettiest dress if I bring her to work with me next Thursday." At last: the real meaning of Take Our Daughters to Work Day.

 
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