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--John Young

Robyn
Robyn Is Here
(RCA)

There's a JonBenet Ramsey aspect to this trollop from Stockholm. Although she's eighteen, her features have a slightly pudgy, baby-fat quality about them that's apt to appeal equally to pedophiles and youngsters in her prime demographic. As such, she's an ideal candidate for instant stardom, and the folks at RCA have done an admirable job of packaging her for the masses. Of course, Robyn Is Here is extraordinarily negligible: flirty singing, tinny, robotic melodies, PG words (e.g., "I'm the bomb and soon I'll explode...I'm gonna take our destiny/And turn it into freaky reality," from "How"), and hooks the size of Suge Knight's ammunition bill. But its very disposability is what makes it both easy to ignore and unexpectedly tolerable. Christ, I liked it better than the new Blues Traveler album. I think I'll go smoke some crack now.

--Roberts

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