This Year Blows!

The East High Spotlight got in trouble with its April Fool's edition, which noted that "rug-munching" was at an all-time high at Regis Jesuit High School. The issue also offered up this ebonics lesson for a Graland Country Day School student: "After robbin' all those li'l beeyaatches at Boardwalk blind, I took me and my Impala down to the liggidy likou' sto'...I slammed half of a Country Fuzzy Naval Peech boones, outside the sto' and I was straight perved, son."

Or, to quote our leader (for the next twelve days), in his intro to Best Place: "I am no fan of retrospectives: I have always been more interested in where we're going than in where we've been. But I also recognize that understanding the past can help us shape the future.