Ball Carriers

Is a Post reporter offsides when it comes to the people he covers?

But at the same time, Schefter says, "I don't make any secret of the fact that my relationships with Terrell and Mike have been enhanced because I worked with them. It's part of my job to build positive relationships and maintain them. That's what it's all about."

The contrast between the overblown ring-of-fame ceremony for John Elway on September 13 and the Broncos' humiliating defeat to the Miami Dolphins in the game that accompanied it may have left Coloradans feeling heartsick, but it seemed to thrill many national media types. Even Good Morning America news reader Antonio Mora and weather guy Tony Perkins (loved him in Fear Strikes Out) spent some time the morning after giggling about how the Broncos may have to get used to losing now that Big John has hung up his spurs.

Mike Shanahan's Think Like a Champion.
Mike Shanahan's Think Like a Champion.
Rah rah: Mike Shanahan's Champion co-author Adam Schefter, pictured as a Broncos cheerleader on the Dennis Britton Go Home! Page.
Rah rah: Mike Shanahan's Champion co-author Adam Schefter, pictured as a Broncos cheerleader on the Dennis Britton Go Home! Page.

GMA is also devoting plenty of airtime to another Colorado tale -- a five-part interview with Linda Arndt, the former Boulder detective who was present when the body of JonBenét Ramsey was found back in 1996. Lawyers representing John and Patsy Ramsey characterize Arndt's speculations about the case as "bizarre," and that's as good a word for them as any. In the segments that had been televised at press time, Arndt, who reportedly chatted for over four hours with correspondent Elizabeth Vargas, almost seemed to be channeling the dead child, widening her eyes like an especially theatrical psychic as she said things like, "I saw black with thousands of lights, and everything that I had noted that morning that stuck out instantly made sense." Think she charges extra for palm-reading?

Attempting to read minds, not palms, were staffers at the local arm of the Onion, America's finest satirical weekly, who chose to steer clear of an article about the hottest Colorado story of them all: the shootings at Columbine High School. The Onion Web site ( currently features "Columbine Jocks Safely Resume Bullying," a piece generated by writers at the Onion's Madison, Wisconsin, headquarters in which fictional halfback Jason LeClaire states, "We have begun the long road to healing. We're bouncing back, more committed than ever to ostracizing those who are different." Adds his equally imaginary girlfriend, Kellie Nelson: "A school where the jocks cannot freely exclude math geeks, drama fags, goths and other inferiors without fearing for their lives is not the kind of school I want to go to." So why doesn't this edgy lampoon appear in the edition that's on our streets right now? Dave Haupt, the publisher of the Denver-Boulder paper, says that he and his staff can choose to run, or not run, any of the material cooked up in Madison -- and in this case, the Columbine effort was rejected because it "hit a little too close to home." To paraphrase Steve Martin, comedy isn't always pretty.

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