Letters to the Editor

From the week of March 21, 2002

Bravo to you, Dr. Dicke. I wish you the best in your war against the New Inquisition. Too bad there are not more doctors like you. But wait -- that would then make you an "expert." Hmm. God bless America, land of the once free, home of the enslaved.

Jimi Cavaleri

Dillies Pickle

From Mork to dork: Gee, my fellow Boulderian Bart Windrum seemed a little testy in his March 14 letter. I thought Ms. Calhoun's February 28 "The Peter Principle" was a deft wrap-up of the whole El Dildo! business. He's completely right about the essential bogusness of the flag issue, however.

As for the penile puns, they're perhaps the most fun in the whole affair, allowing us to revisit briefly the unbridled ribaldry of childhood humor and use some difficult-to-fit-in material. I take modest pride in dubbing the theft of the crockery cockery a "dildo dido."

And as for El Dildo's fifteen minutes of infame, my colleagues and I, of Boulderia's Shadow Government here in our underground command center deep beneath Mork 'n' Mindy's house, have vowed it shall not perish! We have inaugurated an ongoing series of solemn civic awards, The Dillies (www.mondoboulder.com), to express our relief (that it was someone else caught being such a horse's ass) and gratitude (for a break from the endemic preaching and sermonizing) for Boulderians who make egregious fools of themselves in public.

Keep up the good work.

Peter Aretin

The Turn of the Screw

Snow job: I have read Patricia Calhoun's columns for many years and want to say I have really enjoyed them. I am glad she has an interest in the Winter Park issue ("Schuss!" March 14). So do I. I ski there, and I love that mountain. And by the way, I love it the way it is.

Things are in a sad state these days. Pardon me for sounding like an old hippie, but twenty or so corporations seem to own everything. A right-wing conservative is running the country and using the patriotism hat to do everything from trash the environment to threaten Iraq with nuclear bombs. Not real smart.

Then, closer to home, there's all the growth here and the havoc it's wreaked on us all, with clogged roads, clogged lift lines, trophy homes and transplants everywhere. Not to mention the toll to our souls, those of us who love this place and loved it and lived here long ago. It makes you feel pretty helpless, especially when you realize the two senators from Colorado are Campbell and Allard.

I hope Westword continues to follow the Winter Park fiasco closely; I hadn't heard anything about it in a while. But with Vail Associates having a say in it all, how can this be expected to work out? Webb's bumbling legal team against VA's and Intrawest's? What a joke. Remember Pat Bowlen's legal team, for example, and how the city pretty much got screwed.

Anyway, keep up the good work and the whistle-blowing. It gives people like me a reason to believe that everything is not lost. At least, not quite yet.

Julie C. Meadows
via the Internet

Watching Your Wait

The joke's on us: Kyle Wagner's February 28 Bite column was slated for April 1, right?

Jeez, Kyle, what happened to personal etiquette? What moron would go to a busy restaurant and hog a table for three hours? A conceited moron, I would guess!

I like to sit in my favorite restaurants for hours...but I make sure it is when they are not busy, and I tip well. Anytime I discovered that I had been waiting in line for an hour while some dullards were conducting business at a table for hours, I would gladly join the restaurant management in heaving them out in the street.

Gus S. Calabrese

Editor's note: You're not alone, Gus. For more wait-watchers, see this week's Bite.

All Vets Are Off

We were soldiers: Nobody likes mistakes. I talked with Alan Prendergast about an error in "Badge Happy," in the March 14 issue. I am not a Vietnam veteran; I am a Vietnam-era veteran.

The error is easily explained. Alan had previously interviewed me and local folk artist Bill Potts, who is a friend and occupies one of my rental houses. Prendergast thought Potts and I knew one another from a Vietnam connection. Although Potts is a Vietnam veteran, he and I met at a Denver flea market in 1987.

The distinction between "Vietnam veteran" and "Vietnam-era veteran" is important to me and to most veterans of that difficult time. My Air Force tour of duty included basic training in Texas and technical school in Mississippi. Previous "ground radio" airmen went to Vietnam, but my "flight" split, and half entered telecommunications. My assignment was to Strategic Air Command (SAC) HQ, near Omaha, Nebraska (1969-1973).

It is important for me to respect those who actually went to Vietnam. I believe in correcting mistakes swiftly to move forward.

Steve Schweitzberger
Jefferson County

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