Best Hot-Sheets Motel

The room decor inside Mon Chalet comes from the Hollywood Porno Playground school of interior design. Neon accents, water-column lights, mirrored ceilings and walls, and giant whirlpool baths are standard features in Mon Chalet's ten deluxe and semi-deluxe suites, as are king-sized beds, whether standard or octagon-shaped, firm mattress or waterbed. Optional room features include climate-control chambers (programmable sun, steam, warm breeze and rain), and specialty furnishings, including the "Love Machine," which the motel's Web site (www.mon-chalet.com) describes as "a sturdy furniture masterpiece designed for the more athletic expression of the sensual arts." Suspended over the beds in several rooms are models of "The Swing," also known as "Mon Chalet's version of the Taiwan Basket." Room rates for deluxe suites are $110 on weeknights, $145 on weekends. Semi-deluxe rooms go for $100/$125. Mon Chalet also offers four-hour quickie "matinee rates," from noon to four p.m., for $40 to $60, depending on the room. Get on up.