So should I write a review about that experience? Probably. But what more can I say about a night spent sucking down lowest-common-denominator pap? That I felt like I'd just been stripped naked and dipped in a vat of 60/40 salad oil? No one needs to hear that.
So I pick and choose. When I review a chain restaurant, I have a reason for being there. Either it's done better than I expected or has some draw powerful enough to get me through the doors. At Griff's, it was history. At Tucanos, an opportunity to discuss American shopping-mall culture. And even though the demographics say I should be eating one and a quarter meals every day at a chain restaurant, don't expect to see an Outback Steakhouse review in this space next week.
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Leftovers: The first Marie Callender'sin Denver -- built, owned and run by the McArthur family since 1976 on South Yosemite -- ended its 28-year run last week. "A hit from the start," remembers Lydia McArthur. "My husband worked hard to stay away from the 'chain' attitude and continued to create food each day from scratch." But ultimately, she says, declining sales, changing demographics and her husband's health problems did the place in. And chain or no, this closure is reason for sadness, because the McArthurs made great pies, and a good lemon meringue washes clean many sins. Just four more Marie Callender's outposts remain in the metro area, out of about 150 in the country.
While I doubt that Taste of Philly -- the little cheesesteak shop that could -- is ever going to get up into that range, it now has three locations: the original, at 2432 South Colorado Boulevard, a second spot at 2660 East County Line Road in Littleton, and a third that had its grand opening last week at 8755 Wadsworth Boulevard in Westminster. What with Taste of Philly making the best cheesesteak in the city (on Amoroso-brand rolls), as well as displaying TastyKakes and Pennsylvania Dutch-style birch beer, every new address of this sandwich shop is cause for celebration.
Here's some news that will mess up my entire system of gauging restaurants: The Hornet has a new man in the kitchen, and it's none other than Kevin Savoy. If the name sounds familiar, it should. Savoy has made repeated appearances in this column: He always seems to be the guy leaving a kitchen just ahead of the introduction of a new chef, a new concept or some sort of massive overhaul in operations. He was at Flow pre-Duy Pham, at Opal post-Duy, and was most recently seen fleeing Agave Underground just ahead of the arrival of Kirk Bliss from Seven 30 South, who did double duty at Agave and Seven 30 until new Agave top dog Michael Degenhart signed on. (Like Duy Pham, Degenhart got his start at Tante Louise, then moved on to the Manor House -- and he apparently won't be joining Pham in Meeker, as Duy suggested in this column two weeks ago.)
Anyway, Savoy now has the reins at a joint that I've used as my zero-point restaurant since moving to Denver, the place against which all other downtown restaurants were judged. The Hornet has always been exactly good enough -- neither outstanding nor awful -- and a visit here served to regulate my restaurant judgment. If I liked a spot more than the Hornet, it was good. If I'd rather be at the Hornet than where I was, then both the place and I were in serious trouble.
But now that system's shot to hell, and I'm going to have to find a new spot against which to calibrate my opinions. It's too early to know what will happen to the Hornet under Savoy's tenure, but I'm hoping for the best.
Two weeks ago in this column, I offered my musings on the secret of eternal happiness: a long lunch. Now one of my favorite restaurants is taking up the cause. Le Central has proposed that every April be a time for long lunches, lazy afternoons and a return to "the mystic time before the alternative-minimum tax, the tattooed waiter, the fusion food or the espresso to go." And owner Robert Tournieris putting his money where his mouth is, with $2 well martinis ($3 for call) with any lunch entree, and a "retro food sampler" menu to keep that long lunch going all day long.
