Tax audits, invasive surgery, DIA over the holidays. Sadly, although people try to avoid such horrors at all costs, it's impossible. On my last trip to DIA, I stood in line for what seemed like a lifetime, only to have Mr. TSA ask me to take off my belt, shoes and sweater. Seriously, I take off fewer clothes on most first dates than I do going through DIA security. Mr. TSA (I think that stands for Terminal Slackers of America) then proceeded to search my entire carry-on suitcase. When he got to my underwear, I asked him to change his nasty-ass rubber gloves that had touched a million offensive items and that I didn't want anywhere near my panties. A glove-change request required a supervisor's approval, so after a ten-minute delay, Mr. TSA proceeded to meander through my unmentionables and finally found the offending item: cuticle scissors. (Bless you, TSA, for saving me from the terrorists who are going to take over the plane with three-inch scissors that barely cut cuticles.) Needless to say, by the time I made it through, I was ready for a cocktail -- no matter that it was only 9 a.m. In order not to look like one of those people you always see slumped over their beers in airport bars early in the morning, I headed straight for the upstairs level of Concourse B, home of Wolfgang Puck Express. The Red Rocks Bloody Mary ($6.80) with Absolut Peppar Vodka, tomato juice and spices helped me forget the loss of my favorite cuticle scissors. A second Wolfgang Puck Express location will open at First Avenue and Fillmore Street on February 9; it will serve only beer and wine, but since you don't have to go through security to reach Cherry Creek, that shouldn't be a problem.