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Big Trouble

Gary Haney was living the high life until meth took him down.

Gary Haney likes things big. Big portions, big tits, big money. Big ideas, too. To be the Larry Flynt of the Rocky Mountains -- that was his big dream.

But right now, Gary Haney's in big trouble.

On December 9, 2005, the Denver District Attorney's Office issued a warrant for the arrest of Gary Don Haney on charges of aggravated robbery and second-degree assault, identifying him as the owner of Touch Companions, a company that operated out of a house at 3121 York Street.

According to a police report, Haney had called a female employee to the residence two nights earlier and accused her of "conducting professional business on the side and therefore taking money from him." He then struck the woman on the head multiple times with a baseball bat and repeatedly punched her in the head, body and back. But he avoided hitting her in the face.

The woman told police that Steve Papson, Haney's business colleague and the owner of the house, began to close doors and windows so that her screams wouldn't wake the neighbors. Papson then took her purse into a bedroom while Haney removed $560 from her jacket pocket, telling her that she owed him $5,000 more for all of the calls she had stolen. Haney threatened to kill her and her daughter if she went to the police, the woman reported.

As the sordid story spread throughout Denver's underground escort industry -- which, despite its product, is guided more by standard business practices than street-hustling principles -- the reaction was a mix of shock and disappointment. The 34-year-old Haney had spent almost two decades in the adult-entertainment business and had, just a few years before, been the owner of Colorado's premier escort agency. Although people knew that Haney had slid downhill recently, no one would have pegged him as a low-life, woman-beating street pimp. It didn't jive with the image he'd built of himself as the cunning but kindhearted Big Daddy of Denver's nightlife.

Haney not only likes things big, he's big himself -- over 350 pounds on a 5'9" frame. But his stable of female companions who exchanged sex for big cash didn't seem to mind. Nor did his business associates. If you get big enough, Haney figured, no one can touch you -- unless you want them to, of course.

Living the high life of lofts, limos and limitless drugs, Haney could see his big idea so clearly: a media empire built on man's most primal instinct. A whole world of sex -- real sex -- just a click or a phone call away. He wasn't looking for mainstream acceptance of the "adult lifestyle," but he did think there were ways to make it more classy, safe and profitable. It could be done. And then he would leave it all behind for something even bigger.

Instead, Haney got trapped in the underbelly of the sex world. For all his Big Daddy ideas, his big needs -- for sex, for drugs, for money to buy the drugs -- landed him in jail, just a big pimp behind bars.


"Marlon Brando on Acid! is how a good friend of mine, who by the way is one hell of a tattoo artist, recently described me."

Thus begins Haney's long-abandoned home page onmyspace.com, the web community popular with the under-35 crowd. His stats include:

Interests: Travel, nightclubbing and making money.

Music: House, Trance, Rock, Jazz

Status: Single

Here for: Networking, Dating, Serious Relationships, Friends

Orientation: Straight

Body type: 5'9"/ More to love!

Ethnicity: White/Caucasian

Zodiac sign: Scorpio

Smoke/Drink: Yes/Yes

Children: Undecided

For his income, Haney lists $150,000 to $250,000 a year, earned as the CEO of Touch Hypermedia, an "Internet technologies" firm based in Denver.

"It wasn't until about a year ago that I truly understood just how kick-ass this life has been," continues Haney's About Me blurb. "And to tell you the truth, it doesn't seem to be slowing down much. I have seen, felt, and experienced more in the last decade than I believe most people will experience their whole lives."


Gary Haney's experiences started on November 18, 1971. His mother, Lesa, had gotten pregnant at age fourteen, when she had sex for the first time; fearing that she wouldn't be able to care for a child on her own, she'd agreed to put the baby up for adoption. But after giving birth, she changed her mind. So she hid the tiny boy under her gown and smuggled him out of the hospital. He'd barely left the womb, and already Haney was an accomplice in a desperate caper.

As Haney grew, so did his level of misbehavior. By the time he was a preteen, his constant hell-raising was too much for his mom to handle. He was sent to live with his father, but Dad wasn't much of a disciplinarian. When the boy came home after a day of running wild, his father gave him a beer instead of a lecture.

"I quickly came to the realization that causing shit is fun, but it isn't so much fun if you don't have someone telling you not to do it," Haney told Westword shortly after he moved to Denver. (Haney has refused repeated interview requests for this story, which is based on recent interviews with more than a dozen of his former business associates, employees, friends and former friends, as well as on "Breast Reduction," originally published in the November 25, 1999, issue of Westword.)

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