By Noah Hubbell
By Kiernan Maletsky
By Tom Murphy
By Noah Hubbell
By Alex Distefano
By Darryl Smyers
By Jon Solomon
By Britt Chester
Three of the Briefs' four members -- guitarists Steve E. Nix and Daniel J. Travanti, and drummer Chris Brief -- recently took a few moments to, um, briefly discuss their new album, Steal Yer Heart, as well as punk rock's brevity and the truth behind the songs "Genital General" and "My Girl (Wants to Be a Zombie)."
Westword: Any downside to being so brief?
Steve E. Nix:No.
Anyone ever told you guys to take your time?
Daniel J. Travanti: Only our tour manager.
How brief have you guys been, at your briefest?
SN: Our first show was only three songs long.
Best thing about being a punk rocker?
Chris Brief: Walking down the street in Indiana and having a truckload of guys call you a faggot.
Best year in punk-rock history?
SN: 2005, new Briefs album is out.
Why the skinny new-wave ties and plastic sunglasses?
SN: Coolest costume we could find at garage sales.
Any celebrity fans?
SN: Burt Reynolds, of course.
Boxers or briefs?
DT: I don't wear any.
"Orange Alert" is one of your best songs. Politics and punk, a natural mix?
DT: A necessary mix.
Considering all the things that can kill us lately, how do you sleep at night?
SN: With cyanide by the bedside.
DT: Alcohol helps.
What's wrong with your home town, Seattle?
DT: The neo-conservative hippies that call themselves liberal.
Does living there really make you want to kill yourself?
DT: It has, for sure. I can't stand the rain.
Favorite Starbucks beverage?
Briefly, describe the new album.
SN: Like sitting naked in your kitchen on PCP, with every kitchen appliance on.
It's an album of anti-love songs. Don't you have a heart?
SN: Actually, we have very large, bleeding hearts full of chocolate syrup and cornstarch.
Who's the "Genital General"?
DT: That's going to be [bassist] Steve [Kicks]. He won't admit it, but it's him.
If your girl did become a zombie, would you kick her out of bed?
DT: No, but I think sex with dead people is illegal. I definitely would not tell anyone.
Best zombie movie ever?
SN:Dawn of the Dead.
DT: Night of the Living Dead, for sure.
Can your new bassist Steve Kicks kick my ass?
DT: Yeah. He used to play hockey, you know?
Finally, can we hang out sometime?
SN: Yeah, of course. We'll play pinball and shit.