Cred Sheet

Stuff you need to know to avoid ostracism: Cred Sheet is a periodic gauge of cultural stimuli for those unwilling or unable to think about this shit for a living 24/7. (Note: These people are often smarter and better compensated than those who are willing and able.) It seeks to be a reliable font of valuable info and ostensible humor. Clip it out and take it along to speed-dating engagements as a valuable icebreaker and greased pathway to "The Coitus." Have at you.

Gratuitous Nudity

Pitchfork now posting naked photos of indie-rock stars for some reason.

Another reason not to look forward to the new LCD Soundsystem album.

Literary Triumph

Seven different people pitch a book on Weezer's Pinkerton to the 33 1/3 series.

Yeah, whatever, as long as you leave room for Hysteria and Please Hammer Don't Hurt 'Em.

This Song Will Change Your Life

Covox's version of "Computer Love" on 8-Bit Operators: A Tribute to the Music of Kraftwerk.

If you find a way to hack into my Nintendo so this is playing along to Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!, I will never leave the house.

Album of the Year This Week

Good Lord almighty, this Pretty Ricky record.

Someone took Dave Chappelle's "Piss on U" just a little too seriously.

Internet Distraction

Publicly admitting a fondness for that new OK Go video where everything blends into the wallpaper.

Considerably more damning than confessing to a triple homicide or porn addiction.

Fashion Nugget

The similarity between that wallpaper and the suit Ornette Coleman wore to the Grammys.

Useful if the Red Hot Chili Peppers are stalking you and you wish to escape detection.