Jerk-Off at the Gang Bang

Clean, wholesome fun with the Cycle Jerks.

"This isn't your spandex-clad, Ride the Rockies kind of event," says Jennifer Nordhem of the Cycle Jerks' Memorial Day Weekend double blowouts, Foreplay and Gang Bang. The Cycle Jerks are a Denver-based Internet television group, but they also happen to throw the baddest bicycle bashes this town has ever seen — and this weekend's spectacle will be no exception. According to Nordhem, the Jerks "are just a bunch of kids who love riding bikes, loud music and getting drunk. The titles are in no way intended to promote rape or be degrading to anyone." Instead, the name is one part shock value, one part ode to the Jerks and a dash of warning to any who may join. To participate, head to the Larimer Lounge (2721 Larimer Street) tonight at 6 p.m. to register your team (three to five people, including one girl) for some Foreplay — an alleycat race followed by an evening of metal bands. Tomorrow's Gang Bang is the big event, a moonlight scavenger hunt in which teams compete for points by collecting odds and ends, showing up for hourly checkpoints and drinking up the Gang Bang specials at participating bars for extra credit from 9 p.m. to 5 a.m. Rest up after the hunt and make it back for the awards ceremony at 3 Kings Tavern (60 South Broadway) at 4:30 p.m. on Sunday. The entire weekend costs only $20 and includes racing, rock and roll, free PBR, a few good meals and a T-shirt. Remember: You must be eighteen to race and 21 to rock. For rules, instructions and other information, visit www.cyclejerks.com.

And look your best, because you could end up in the next episode of Cycle Jerks.
Fri., May 23, 6 p.m., 2008

 
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