A husband and wife desperate to gamble at a casino in Central City left their baby in a locked car in a parking garage for over an hour last June. The mom returned to the car around the same time as the police, who charged the parents with child abuse. In Parker, a woman was accused of leaving her one-year-old baby in a hot car while she went into the At the Beach tanning salon in Parker; she was cited for child abuse.

Police in Jefferson County arrested a 51-year-old Jefferson High School cafeteria manager in January and accused her of dishing up more than just food. Several teenagers at the school claimed the woman was actually their marijuana hookup.

Fireworks weren't the only thing that got lit on July 4: A woman claimed that employees at a Longmont Chili's served alcoholic fruit smoothies to her three young children. Pam Bruenning and her family were on their way to see a fireworks show when they decided to cool off at the restaurant. After her eight-year-old daughter complained of dizziness, Bruenning took a sip of her drink — and, as she told the Longmont Daily Times-Call, she was overwhelmed by the taste of alcohol. Bruenning complained, the fire department was called, the kids were taken to the hospital. Everyone made it to the fireworks show.

In Arvada, police arrested a woman who allegedly got into a 2 a.m. fight with her daughter over a Facebook post that included the word "vagina," then handcuffed the fourteen-year-old and called the police. The girl ran away to a neighbor's house. Mom was arrested.

In May, an eighth-grader at Craig Middle School who wore a breast-cancer-awareness bracelet to school that read "I Heart Boobies! Keep a Breast!" was called into the principal's office and lectured. Afterward, the ACLU stepped in to give the Moffat County School District its own lecture on First Amendment rights. The school said it didn't want the bracelets to become a distraction, but decided to allow them. Boobies, boobies, boobies.

Good God

The Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs built an outdoor chapel — at a reported cost of $80,000 — for pagans, Wiccans, druids and other service members who practice earth-based religions; the chapel consists of a circle of stones around an altar. The Academy has faced numerous accusations in recent years that it favors evangelical Christianity.

In July, the Christian dating site said it had determined that Denver was one of the top five cities in the nation where active Christian singles could find dates with similar interests — and this was way before Tebowmania. The other cities on the list were Atlanta, Dallas, Jacksonville and Houston.

In November, some Tebow fans began customizing their No. 15 jerseys so that they had the name "Jesus" on them instead of "Tebow." The jerseys were just one of many religion-related tie-ins to the Christian quarterback — some done out of love, some as mockery — the most famous of which was the Tebowing phenomenon, which mimicked Tebow's one-kneed prayer motion.

Former pastor Ted Haggard's real life was weird enough when he was forced to resign his position as head of the evangelical New Life Church in 2006, after it was revealed that he was doing drugs and had a relationship with a male prostitute. But things got even weirder when Haggard signed on for not one, but two reality shows. The first was a one-hour special on the TLC network. The second is Celebrity Wife Swap, during which he'll trade spouses with actor Gary Busey. Look for that show to debut in January.

Pants on the ground

It's hard to eat and drive at the same time. It's even more difficult to go through the Burger King drive-thru without your pants on. In January, Richard Troupe of Longmont was arrested after he pulled into a drive-thru on Ken Pratt Boulevard and asked the female employee there if she wanted to touch his whopper. She didn't. Troupe was eventually convicted of indecent exposure while masturbating, public indecency and driving drunk. No word on whether he got fries to go with that shake.

After someone reported a naked man walking down Cheyenne Street in May, Golden police tried to talk to the fellow — but he ran away and headed uphill, climbing over rocks and through bushes and trees. The cops gave chase right up the mountain, and eventually caught the man.

A man described by Loveland police as "quite obese," white and between twenty and thirty years old, exposed himself in a Walmart store to several people in March. No details about his junk were released.

In April, vandals decapitated a controversial sculpture of a nude person climbing a wall that sits in a roundabout in the town of Silt. Police estimated the damage at $1,000.

Pet projects

So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Good joke, but not for the threesome of Michael Joseph Miller, Kenneth Recker and Roxanne Lange, who in December rode their horses around Steamboat Springs and into various businesses, including a Safeway (where they were asked to leave) and a bar called the Old Town Pub. Miller got into a fight at the bar, according to police, and was tasered when he refused to dismount.

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