Dear Stoner: Can we light up at parties now?

Dear Stoner: Do you think it's socially acceptable now to light up at a party in Colorado or not? Holiday parties are coming up, and I'd much rather smoke a few joints than choke down another pint of bourbon and eggnog.

Tired of Sneaking Off to My Car

Dear Sneaking: We hear you loud and clear. Not that we mind the occasional adult beverage, but holiday parties are much better when you don't spend the following day puking up red and green cupcakes or freaking out because you slept with your boss's newly legal daughter.

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The answer is a resounding yes. Cannabis use for adults over 21 has been legalized in Colorado, and it's high time we start treating it like alcohol socially as well as politically. Make new friends and enjoy the shock and awe on your alcoholic co-worker's face (they'll all be drunk and forget it by morning anyway). This works best if you work for a company that doesn't drug-test you or if you have a boss who wears flip-flops 365 days a year.

That said, if your company has a no-marijuana policy, then you would be committing career suicide if you were to spark one in front of the CEO. Colorado's new pot laws aren't going to protect you when it comes to that, because employers can set any rules they want regarding drug (and alcohol) use. Sorry, but in that case, it's back to sneaking one-hitters in the Subaru and pretending you're not high — despite your red eyes and constant use of the word "dude," dude.

Dear Stoner: Since e-cigarettes and hookah pens seem to give those who smoke such a hard-on, has anyone thought of inventing the e-joint? Like, making an e-cig that actually looks like a hand-rolled joint except that when you take a hit, the tip glows multiple colors? Say one hit it lights up green, the next maybe purple, then blue, and maybe it occasionally cycles through all the colors on a hit — and has a fold-down roach clip so you can slip it into a pocket?

C.R.

Dear C.R.: I don't want to blow your mind, but I think you just thought of inventing the e-joint. Seriously, though, e-vape pens are everywhere these days, and the key to them is that they are stealth. While it's a novel idea to have a digital joint, people who bust out a vape to smoke discreetly are usually the people who don't want to bust out a joint — real or fake.

 
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11 comments
nativespirit101
nativespirit101

Man I wish they would all just chill on this weed thing  man us old schools been doing it for years  they act like its a new toy or something    that's your brain on drugs...

JohnThomas
JohnThomas

Let no fascist employers feel smug from this article.  You will  NOT get to continue firing people - or not hire people - based on the results of urine tests.  These tests do not indicate current impairment.  They only show if someone has consumed marijuana in the last month.

You have no rights to dictate employees behavior in their own homes, on their own time - especially now that marijuana is legal.

We've got your number.

__McShyster__
__McShyster__

Puerile Pot Punks are as Puerile Pot Punks do!


stupidstuka
stupidstuka

Idiot. Colorado is an "at will" state regarding employment law, meaning employers can fire or not hire anyone they want for any reason or no reason - excepting race, religion, national origin, sex, etc.

Employers can refuse to hire TOBACCO smokers, the can certainly kick lowgrade drooling bong-sucking stoners to the gutter.

nativespirit101
nativespirit101

@stupidstuka your right John Thomas is stupid  an its insurance that makes them give the tests anyway   dude!  Bankers an Insurance rule the world..

JohnThomas
JohnThomas

@stupidstuka -  You certainly have an appropriate handle. - You apparently believe you live in a static universe, where nothing ever changes.  Here's a clue, the universe (the world, the country, etc.) is ALL ABOUT change.  The paradigm changing re-legalization of marijuana in Colorado and Washington state should have shown you that.

It is not fair, but there is some rationale for employers excluding tobacco smokers - since it is the recreational drug that causes the most destruction - being the cause of death of hundreds of thousands of Americans alone every year.

There is no such rationale for excluding marijuana consumers, of course.  As the DEA's own administrative law judge, Francis Young, concluded after an exhaustive review of the evidence,  "Marijuana, in its natural form, is one of the safest therapeutically active substances known to man."

In fact, NO ONE has ever died from consuming marijuana in all of recorded history.

Of course, marijuana is also FAR safer than alcohol.  It is less intoxicating,  has no long-term health effects, and does not fuel violence and traffic accidents as does alcohol.

Your hate-drenched demonization of marijuana consumers reveals you for the bigot you are. 

SAMHSA research determined more than 100 million Americans have consumed marijuana. That's near HALF the of-age population. There are an estimated 30 million current consumers. The vast majority consume moderately - on the weekends or less, and are successful, hard-working, respected members of their communities. They are from all walks of life and loved by the families they support.

Marijuana is as American as apple pie - and healthier.

So the question becomes, do you ever have a beer or a glass of wine?  If so, you will likely be kicked to the curb long before marijuana consumers of the near future will.

stupidstuka
stupidstuka

... regulate marijuana LIKE alcohol, asshole.

nativespirit101
nativespirit101

@JohnThomas @stupidstuka John its just the south fighting the north   All the Government has to do is say close them all an its all over     still illegal in the Gov. eyes  so chill out just go smoke some catnip so you will be ok  geeezzz   DUDE!!!

JohnThomas
JohnThomas

@stupidstuka - Try taking a course in debate, and you might catch a clue of why I used the word "as," Stupid.

 
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