WW: What do you think is the worst non-derogatory word in the English language? BF: Oh, that's a good one...velvet.
WW: What is your favorite food paired with orange juice? BF: Spirulina.
WW: Does the Categorical Imperative work in reality as a basis for moral action? BF: That's kind of a deep question. I say no, because why would we all want to be monotonous. The world is a beautiful place because of its diversity. You have to have good and bad, you know?
WW: What are you listening to? BF: I am listening to, on more than a weekly basis, a Clap Your Hands, Say Yeah album, and when I'm working it's The Rachels. They're fucking awesome...because I can't listen to any words when I'm working.
WW: What gets you up in the morn? BF: Sunshine and coffee. Seizing the day and giving kisses to my cat.
WW: Define defenestration. BF: The act of always having a plan to end the world. Like the Futurist movement when everyone wanted to destroy the academic past, burn libraries and praise the flying machine. [Editor's note: Although creative, this definition is incorrect. "Defenestration" is in fact the act of throwing someone or something out a window. For that reason, it is probably the most awesome word in the English language].WW: When did they conceive of the flying machine? BF: Well, they had the train in 1909, when the movement started, which was the fastest thing back then, but I'm not sure. When was Amelia Earhart?
WW: I think the 1930s. What's your favorite mythical animal? BF: Unicorns are fucking awesome. They're just beautiful, and there are always sparkles around and some sort of melancholy rhythm when they run by.
WW: Who can eat the most? BF: My brother. He was really poor when he lived in Hawaii, and he would climb up trees and eat like a dozen coconuts a day. Crack 'em open with a machete. He's funny.
WW: Speaking of funny, you got any jokes? BF: Yes. Why do girls wear makeup and perfume?
WW: I have no idea, why? BF: Because they're ugly and they smell bad [laughs]. I was going between that one and the Nebraska joke.WW: What's the Nebraska joke? BF: Why is Nebraska so windy?
WW: I don't know. BF: Because Iowa sucks and Wyoming blows.
WW: Iowa does suck. Sorry Iowans. What's the weirdest thing you've overheard in recent memory? BF: No comment.
WW: What does it mean to launch all vipers? BF: Military code for kicking some serious ass.
WW: Finish this sentence: ________ will ruin the world? BF: Big oil. Fo sho.
WW: Name two factors that led to the fall of the Roman Empire. BF: Poor sanitation...and wasn't there some invasion of some kind?
WW: Any final words? BF: I'm finishing school in two weeks, and I need a job. Hire me for letterpress or design, please!
Bailey and her fellow students are hosting ZeroMile 005's release party at Stoney's Bar at 1111 Lincoln Street on December 10th from 6-9 p.m. Free entry, photolapse booth, video art, screen printing and more will be going down, so check it out. To view more of Bailey's work visit bferguson.wordpress.com.
