Geek love: Five film tales of nerd romance
If these two can find love together, we all have a shot.
Valentine's Day is nearly upon us, and love is in the air. Everywhere you look, people are planning fancy dates or at least renting their favorite romantic movies for a night of couch-snuggling with their beloved. Contrary to the stereotypes, geeks are no different. Well, maybe a little different -- at least when it comes to favorite romantic movies. Where your average person might reach for Titanic, The Notebook or Casablanca -- fine movies all! -- geeks prefer geekier love stories. After all, why settle for normal people in love when you could enjoy superheroes, aliens or even just other geeks in love? With that in mind, we present five geeky love stories for the ages.
Superman: The Movie
Sure, the love story between Superman and Lois Lane isn't really the focal point of the movie, but there's no denying that the Man of Steel has a serious soft spot for the plucky reporter. He flies her around the city, gives her an exclusive interview and then, after her untimely death, proves his love by spinning the Earth backwards so quickly that time itself is reversed. Admittedly, this makes absolutely no sense, but you have to admit that it's pretty fucking romantic, allowing him to save his love and set the stage for even more romancing in Superman II.
The quirky, family-safe indie comedy Napoleon Dynamite features two of the biggest geeks ever committed to film in Napoleon and Kip Dynamite, a pair of brothers growing up in a rural Idaho community. Over the course of the film, both of them find true love -- Kip with LaFawnduh, a woman he meets in an AOL chatroom, and Napoleon with Deb, who he attempts to impress by catching her a delicious bass. It's even good for the forever alone out there, because if these two awkward goofballs can find love, there's hope for everybody. Even Uncle Rico reunites with his girlfriend, and there's a nice bromance between Napoleon and Pedro thrown in just for good measure. Sweet!
When you think of David Cronenberg's gory body-horror remake of The Fly, romance probably isn't the first thing that comes to mind, but underneath the pus-covered, open-sore-riddled skin of the movie, it's all about love. Real-life (at the time) couple Geena Davis and Jeff Goldblum portray a reporter and scientist who get caught up in a passionate affair that is tragically cut short by Goldblum's character accidentally merging his DNA with that of a fly, a hurdle that even the best relationships might have trouble clearing. Still, he refuses to give up, hoping she can help him salvage his humanity, even if that means -- in typically Cronenbergian fashion -- fusing himself, her and their unborn child into one big mutant being via teleportation technology. See, love truly knows no bounds, especially when you're a mad scientist infused with fly DNA.
Back when Tim Burton could still make movies that didn't seem to simply be parodies of his own movies, he made a little film called Edward Scissorhands. It's your typical boy with scissors for hands meets girl, falls in love with girl, is outcast by the community for being a fucking weirdo, captures girl's heart, then is banished again to his hilltop mansion wreckage while girl ages and goes on with life. In other words, just as tragic and fucked up as Romeo and Juliet and Frankenstein combined, which is pretty much exactly what it is. Plus, Johnny Depp is young and hot, even in all that goth makeup, which is always nice.
The Princess Bride
It's a geek movie because it's a rollicking fantasy adventure full of pirates, sword fights, evil princes, giant rats, shrieking eels, rhyming giants, miracle men and castle storming. It's a romance movie because, well, the love of Wesley for Buttercup literally drives the entire plot, from beginning to end. It's also a stone-cold classic that everyone, geek or not, pretty much loves, and once you watch it on Valentine's Day with your beloved, all you have to do is whisper "As you wish" in response to one of their requests and they'll be yours forever.
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