Have you ever typed a letter... on a computer?

Holy crap, have we forgotten how much the computer has made our lives easier. We're not talking about the non-stop stream of free porn -- we're talking about word processing. What's word processing? Well, if you've forgotten (or weren't born yet), word processing was how we first were able to...

By Bree Davies

July 1, 2011

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Holy crap, have we forgotten how much the computer has made our lives easier. We're not talking about the non-stop stream of free porn -- we're talking about word processing. What's word processing? Well, if you've forgotten (or weren't born yet), word processing was how we first were able to type up documents without having to use a typewriter. In fact, as robot teacher Kim Komando shows us on her bulky VHS series The Komputer Tutor, using the computer for word processing saves time and money. On top of eliminating the need for White Out and scissors for literal cutting and pasting (LOL), a computer word processing program like Word Perfect can also remove the need for a dictionary, thesaurus and a book of grammar rules (though the Internet has now eliminated grammar, thankfully.)

In this step-by-step instructional video, Komando tells us how to align paragraphs, merge documents and save your work with the greatest of DOS-prompted ease. But she takes zero crap when explaining how to save a letter you've just written, simply telling you to call the document "thanku," because that's what it is. It's a thank you letter, genius.

Komando's big hair and shitty attitude might make it hard to pay attention to the valuable skills you'll be learning, but that's what the Muzak is for. Just behind the Komputer Tutor's instructional drivel, a soft-sax version of The Bangles' "Eternal Flame" plays subtly, functioning just like a soothing and hellish dentist office soundtrack. We wonder if Kim Komando has an instructional video on how to use our new pager.

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Bree Davies is a multimedia journalist, artist advocate and community organizer born and raised in Denver. Rooted in the world of Do-It-Yourself arts and music, Davies co-founded Titwrench experimental music festival, is host of the local music and comedy show Sounds on 29th on CPT12 Colorado Public Television and is creator and host of the civic and social issue-focused podcast, Hello? Denver? Are You Still There? Her work is centered on a passionate advocacy for all ages, accessible, inclusive, non-commercial and autonomous DIY art spaces and music venues in Denver.

Contact: Bree Davies

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Twitter: @cocodavies