Update: Congratulations to crazeeehoteee! You've won two tickets to tomorrow's Die Hard marathon. Check your email for details on how to claim them.
Original post: On February 13, the Harkins theater in Northfield is celebrating the release of the fifth chapter of the Die Hard franchise with a marathon of the entire film series, which gives moviegoers the opportunity to experience decades of death scenes and Bruce Willis' slowly receding hairline all in one day. Yippe-ki-yay, y'all!
As we all know, the original Die Hard is critically unassailable, the protean ideal of action cinema. Each subsequent entry is but a shadow of the original's former glory, proving my theory that the quality of any Die Hard film is directly proportional to the amount of screen time featuring Reginald VelJohnson. But let's continue: Without further ado, here's a list of John McClane's best kills in the Die Hard pentalogy. And if you share your favorite McClane moment with us, you could win passes to the marathon.
5. Die Hard with a Vengeance Early on in this eminently skippable picture, John McClane uses the close quarters of a full elevator to take on four heavies disguised as security guards. This scene is all headbutting and close-range pistol shots, and it's the highlight of what is arguably the worst Die Hard movie.
4. Die Hard 2: Die Harder Die Hard 2 is better than its reputation suggests, as it features both the highest kill count of any Die Hard movie and the aforementioned Reginald VelJohnson bump. In its best kill scene, John McClane, crumpled on an airport runway, watches in despair as the bad guys make their escape on a plane. Then, of course, he notices a tail of leaking jet fuel, repeats his yippe-ki-catchphrase even though no one is around to hear it, lights the fuel with his handy Zippo lighter and blows up the entire plane.
3. Live Free or Die Hard After enduring a thorough kung-fu beatdown from Maggie Q's character, Mai, McClane crushes her by driving an SUV down an elevator shaft. This sequence is the highlight of an otherwise lackluster third sequel.
2. Die Hard John McClane is nothing if not resourceful, often improvising his killing methods from whatever heavy and/or sharp objects might be at hand. In the fist film, broken glass evolves from an obstacle for the barefooted protagonist to an unlikely ally when it kills one of Hans Gruber's army of vaguely European henchmen, who falls into a window face first after McClane shoots him in the knees.
1. Die Hard 2: Die Harder John McClane stabs a goon in the eyeball with an icicle. Such badassery speaks for itself.
For a disturbingly detailed chronicle of all Die Hard deaths, visit the Die Hard Wiki.
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