rss Email Author Gustavo Arellano


2006 Stories by Gustavo Arellano

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  • What About Wab?

    published December 28, 2006

    Dear Readers: The Mexican is inside a trunk, trying to sneak back into the United States after the holiday. In the meantime, here are some... More >>

  • Gender Bender

    published December 21, 2006

    Dear Mexican: I'm a Spanish-language student struggling with tenses and the gender of nouns. The other day, some friends and I were... More >>

  • Shirt Tale

    published December 14, 2006

    Dear Mexican: It seems that whenever Chicano professors want to show off their mexicanidad, they wear a guayabera. In fact, I saw a... More >>

  • Bugging Out

    published December 7, 2006

    Dear Mexican: I was flipping through television when I noticed the Spanish-language channel showing a man in a red suit with yellow pants,... More >>

  • Irish Ay-Yay-Yay-Yay’s

    published November 30, 2006

    Dear Mexican: Man, did you make me laugh with "leprecanos." I never had more fun on Cinco de Mayo than I did in 1974 in a Cambridge,... More >>

  • Fowl Play

    published November 16, 2006

    Dear Mexican: My fiancé is trying to learn Spanish so he can speak to my grandmother when we get married next month. Lately he's... More >>

  • Lords of the Dance

    published November 9, 2006

    Dear Mexican: Not long ago, I attended a Los Tigres del Norte concert at a small hall. The people attending were supposed to sit down and... More >>

  • Tongue Twister

    published November 2, 2006

    Dear Mexican: A friend says she read somewhere that only 20 percent of Mexican men will go down on their ladies. I don't believe that.... More >>

  • There Goes the Neighborhood!

    published October 26, 2006

    Dear Mexican: It's hard out here for a brotha! First we had to deal with those pieces of shit called the KKK and their supporters.... More >>

  • The Light Stuff

    published October 19, 2006

    Dear Mexican: I have very, very light skin because of my Scandinavian heritage. Around Halloween, someone asked me if it was... More >>

  • Haiti, Bar the Door

    published October 12, 2006

    Dear Mexican: How can you explain the disparity between Japan and Mexico? Japan is a nation a fraction the size of Mexico, with zero... More >>

  • Cholo Contendere

    published October 5, 2006

    Dear Mexican: I once got into a fight with a cholo. We beat the crap out of each other but when all was said and done, I kicked his... More >>

  • Crazy Like a Fox

    published September 28, 2006

    Dear Mexican: I am awestruck by the lack of anger from Mexicans for the Mexican government. Mexican leaders have forced Mexicans from... More >>

  • Making Brown Babies!

    published September 21, 2006

    Dear Mexican: I have a stupid, unemployed, sixteen-year-old gang-bangin' cousin who already dropped out of school, and I'm pretty sure... More >>

  • It's a Crime

    published September 14, 2006

    Dear Mexican: I see Jews, Asians and Persians making something of themselves and conducing safe, walkable communities. Of course... More >>

  • Shirting the Issue

    published September 7, 2006

    Dear Mexican: My gabacha friends and I marched in the May pro-amnesty rallies and wanted to show our support on our chests as... More >>

  • Vision Quest

    published August 31, 2006

    Dear Mexican: I heard that Mexicans at an Orange County candy factory think they saw the Virgin Mary in a pile of melted chocolate.... More >>

  • Spanish Inquisition

    published August 24, 2006

    Dear Mexican: What's with Mexican-Americans who live in New Mexico claiming they're Spanish and not Mexican? Many actually get angry... More >>

  • Drink Up!

    published August 17, 2006

    Dear Mexican: Why do Mexicans forget about great beers like Tecate, Negra Modelo, and Bohemia and start drinking swill like Bud Light... More >>

  • Love, Mexican Style

    published August 10, 2006

    Dear Readers: My July 20 column advising Enamorada Gabacha to improve her relationship with the Mexican who invaded her heart... More >>

  • Reel Life

    published August 3, 2006

    Dear Mexican: The last two movies I attended were rated R. Sitting around me were Mexican families with very young children. Why do... More >>

  • Get Out the Vote

    published July 27, 2006

    Dear Mexican: The Mexican presidential elections have been a freaking mess. I voted for the conservative candidate, Felipe... More >>

  • Something in the Hair

    published July 20, 2006

    Dear Mexican: I just don't get Mexicans and their grooming. The men slick their hair with baby oil, gel or Vaseline, or just shave it... More >>

  • PC Patrol

    published July 13, 2006

    Dear Mexican: I'm a culturally sensitive, PC Asian-American who laughed my head off at Jack Black's imitation of a Mexican in Nacho... More >>

  • He Auto Know

    published July 6, 2006

    Dear Mexican, Why do Mexicans traditionally like Chevys? Did Chevy once target the Mexican consumer base for some reason and it... More >>

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