Eggs Benedict is a notoriously hard dish to pull off. I wasn't even intimidated, though, when my girlfriend told me that's what she wanted for breakfast -- even though I had never made it before, I'm ...
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The beef started on Facebook. Creeped out by last week's TIME cover story about attachment parenting -- you know, the weird one with the preschool-age kid standing on a stool and suckling his mom's t...
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Comes a time in every man's life when he must reckon with the fact that he's become old and crotchety. For me, that day actually came at about... More >>
If there's anything we can learn from A Bag of Hammers, it's that you can't judge a movie by its title -- because if you could, the trailer for A Bag of Hammers would be about twenty times badasser. A...
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Since long ago, the Cat Care Society has employed a truly creative method of raising money for its various cat-related endeavors: Tails of the Painted Cats, in which artists around town are called upo...
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The idea is so intuitive, it's hard to believe nobody's ever thought of it before: Take improv, that most interactive of theatrical arts, and add... More >>
You can't take apart the LEGO sculptures at LEGO Kids Fest. I know, because I tried: Turns out the pieces are all glued together, presumably to protect them from assholes like me. Still, that's about ...
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A long time ago, I was a nineteen-year-old homeless kid. The circumstances aren't particularly important, but basically I just surfed too many... More >>
A twelve-year-old degenerate needs a spot for daily operations: someplace that's secluded, where he can stash his collection of pornos and light a bunch of weird shit on fire, and no one will bother h...
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Long ago, before hippies like Al Gore co-opted it with their environmentalist liberal agenda, Earth Day was a time for honest, hard-working Americans like you and me to celebrate our dominance over th...
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Even people born decades after the Beatles first banded together know that Eric Clapton played lead guitar on "While My Guitar Gently Weeps," as... More >>
Besides blowing the mind of everyone who ever heard it, Sgt. Pepper broke a lot of ground: The album radically expanded the concept of what pop music could be, in the process inventing the studio tech...
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Greek mythology is teeming with dudes who want to murder their fathers so they can bang their mothers. Nevertheless, as compelling as it is, I... More >>
It's a scientific fact that if you watch the canon of David Lynch's full-length films back-to-back, your eyeballs will not only melt, but David Lynch himself will somehow randomly appear to film your ...
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Suelynn Gustafson was doing goth before it was cool. In fact, Suelynn Gustafson was doing goth about five decades before anyone even thought to... More >>
The basic Goodwill business model -- which relies on people cramming a bunch of garbage bags full of random shit they don't want anymore and giving it to Goodwill to sort and sell for cheap -- offers ...
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Last time I went to Vegas, I saw the void, and it was Circus Circus. The epiphany I experienced there, next to a mulleted dad explaining to his... More >>
During the slave trade, a ship's route typically consisted of three legs: from Europe to Africa to trade goods for kidnapped Africans, from Africa... More >>
