Email Author Jef Otte

2012 Stories by Jef Otte

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  FEATURED STORY

  Jake Adam York, Colorado poet and teacher, dead at forty

  published Dec 18, 2012

  For his students at the University of Colorado Denver, where he was an associate professor of English, Jake Adam York had a reputation for being a hardass. You got the feeling it was a reputation he e... More >>

• The Newsboys and the New Boyz duke it out in a Tennessee court

  published July 19, 2012

  The Lord notwithstanding, there were a couple of awesome things about growing up in the Calvinist parochial school system. JK — there was... More >>

• Danny Marianino's fifteen minutes are definitely up

  published July 12, 2012

  Back in the days before MTV nailed down the formula of finding the worst assholes of any given demographic and putting them on television... More >>

• When it comes to Bruce, David Brooks misses the point

  published July 5, 2012

  Certain liberals will try to tell you that Europeans are more cultured than Americans, that Europeans are refined people who sip tea in fancy... More >>

• Saying goodbye (and good riddance) to Katy Perry's Teenage Dream

  published June 28, 2012

  There is no escape from the slow and inscrutable march of time. The passing of the seasons, the withering of these corporeal chains, the... More >>

• Boxing Day

  published June 14, 2012

  Earlier this month, artist Daniel Nilsson posted an ad on Craigslist inviting one lucky stranger to live with him in a 4' x 8' x 4' box for... More >>

• Who should write a new national anthem for our country?

  published June 14, 2012

  The 1997 Detroit Red Wings post-season was an awesome thing to behold for a fifteen-year-old in West Michigan. That's when the Wings shut out... More >>

• Radium and roller coasters: A brief, dirty history of Elitch Gardens

  published June 7, 2012

  Radium was hot at the turn of the twentieth century. Discovered by Marie Curie in 1898, it quickly became big business. People loved radium.... More >>

• What would you do for a celebrity lawsuit?

  published June 7, 2012

  In spite of his being just a wee tiny baby, my nine-month-old son has some surprisingly powerful pinchy-claws. In fact, combined with his baby... More >>

• A Funny Thing Happened

  published May 24, 2012

  It wasn't long after former Westword staffer Joel Warner wrote about "Humor Professor" Peter McGraw ("The Nutty Professor," August 26,... More >>

• Study: Most studies tell us what we already know

  published May 31, 2012

  It was 1984 when the most METAL band of all time (Manowar, obviously) delivered the loudest documented show ever played. Clocking in at a max... More >>

• The Humor Code, Untitled edition: Pete McGraw and Joel Warner explain funny

  published May 27, 2012

  Scientists have long understood that farts are hilarious. What's less understood, however, is why. In all seriousness, though, actual scientists have been trying to theoretically understand humor sinc... More >>

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  FEATURED STORY

  The taste is sweet: How I crushed Andrew Orvedahl with badassery and reason

  published May 21, 2012

  Eggs Benedict is a notoriously hard dish to pull off. I wasn't even intimidated, though, when my girlfriend told me that's what she wanted for breakfast -- even though I had never made it before, I'm ... More >>

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  FEATURED STORY

  The great debate: Andrew Orvedahl and Jef Otte settle their parenting differences like men

  published May 16, 2012

  The beef started on Facebook. Creeped out by last week's TIME cover story about attachment parenting -- you know, the weird one with the preschool-age kid standing on a stool and suckling his mom's t... More >>

• CMT takes a well-worn trip to Redneck Island

  published May 17, 2012

  Comes a time in every man's life when he must reckon with the fact that he's become old and crotchety. For me, that day actually came at about... More >>

• Eric Church's beef is outdated...and lacking taste

  published May 10, 2012

  The American Idol model of pop-star selection is obnoxious for a variety of reasons — the regular televising of Steven Tyler's... More >>

• Social Improv

  published February 16, 2012

  The idea is so intuitive, it's hard to believe nobody's ever thought of it before: Take improv, that most interactive of theatrical arts, and add... More >>

• Is Brian McKnight ready to learn?

  published May 3, 2012

  A few years ago, I was so offensive that there was a protest against me. Like, literally. I was an editor at my college paper, and for our... More >>

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  FEATURED STORY

  LEGO Kids Fest: Whatever it is, they will come to build it

  published Apr 30, 2012

  You can't take apart the LEGO sculptures at LEGO Kids Fest. I know, because I tried: Turns out the pieces are all glued together, presumably to protect them from assholes like me. Still, that's about ... More >>

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  COVER STORY

  For the homeless, "urban camping" is no picnic

  published April 26, 2012

  A long time ago, I was a nineteen-year-old homeless kid. The circumstances aren't particularly important, but basically I just surfed too many... More >>

• It's ridiculous to take Ted Nugent seriously

  published April 26, 2012

  On the wall in my house, right next to the desk where I work, hangs a framed vinyl copy of the 1978 Ted Nugent butt-rocker Weekend... More >>

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  FEATURED STORY

  Blockbuster is moving to Colorado. I'm sending poop.

  published Apr 24, 2012

  A twelve-year-old degenerate needs a spot for daily operations: someplace that's secluded, where he can stash his collection of pornos and light a bunch of weird shit on fire, and no one will bother h... More >>

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  FEATURED STORY

  Earth Day: Five ways to celebrate that liberals aren't telling you about!

  published Apr 20, 2012

  Long ago, before hippies like Al Gore co-opted it with their environmentalist liberal agenda, Earth Day was a time for honest, hard-working Americans like you and me to celebrate our dominance over th... More >>

• Another Clue for You All

  published April 12, 2012

  Even people born decades after the Beatles first banded together know that Eric Clapton played lead guitar on "While My Guitar Gently Weeps," as... More >>

• James McCartney toughs it out in Macca's shadow

  published April 12, 2012

  Greek mythology is teeming with dudes who want to murder their fathers so they can bang their mothers. Nevertheless, as compelling as it is, I... More >>