Email Author Patrick Osborn

2006 Stories by Patrick Osborn

• T.G.I. Friday’s

  published December 28, 2006

  By now you've dug out from under the mounds of wrapping paper and leftovers generated over the last few days and are almost ready to return to... More >>

• Bar Louie

  published December 21, 2006

  Thank God there are only a few more shopping days until Christmas; I've had it with staggering debt. But as long as the malls are going to ruin... More >>

• El Toro Palomo

  published December 14, 2006

  Stupid question, but have you ever just needed a drink? Not wanted one, or felt compelled to have one because it was Friday or Monday... More >>

• Caldonia’s

  published December 7, 2006

  I would like to present the latest Institute of Drinking Studies breakthrough in applied physics: the Bathroom Theory of Relativity. You're... More >>

• Brooklyn’s at the Pepsi Center

  published November 30, 2006

  According to the Guy Code, it is not socially acceptable for two guys to split a burger or any other food item when out in a group. This rule is... More >>

• Hangar Bar

  published November 23, 2006

  Sometimes you just need to get out -- as I did after being cut off on Colorado Boulevard by one of those punk kids who thinks it's cool to push... More >>

• Lucile's

  published November 16, 2006

  I've never been a huge fan of New Orleans, not even now that it's the socially progressive thing to be. And while I've been intrigued by stories... More >>

• Piatti Locali

  published November 9, 2006

  The Institute of Drinking Studies would like to announce the latest social breakthrough: the adult baby shower. This novel concept progresses far... More >>

• The Melting Pot

  published November 2, 2006

  When it comes to cooking, I have just one rule: Never fry bacon naked. Other than that, I've always done whatever works -- but I might have to... More >>

• Buffalo Rose

  published October 26, 2006

  With the election less than two weeks away, gas prices are mysteriously plummeting -- with no real change in the factors that were blamed for... More >>

• Lime XS

  published October 19, 2006

  There's nothing like drinking when you're already at a disadvantage. We recently hit Lime XS (730 East Sixth Avenue), the new, smaller... More >>

• Hillcrest Grill

  published October 12, 2006

  We've all had those days when we just really want -- and borderline physically need -- a beer. This doesn't necessarily mean that it's been... More >>

• Pepsi Center

  published October 5, 2006

  Waiting in line for tickets was one of the most worthwhile pastimes of my underage drinking years. But great seats (and drunks) weren't the only... More >>

• Morrison Inn

  published September 28, 2006

  The Institute had decided to close out the summer with a showing of Old School at Red Rocks. Unfortunately, to get to the Morrison... More >>

• JD’s Bait Shop Sports Grill

  published September 21, 2006

  It's that most beautiful time of year when guys can disappear for up to 72 hours without too much questioning from the women in our lives. It's... More >>

• Blue Bonnet

  published September 14, 2006

  The Blue Bonnet (457 South Broadway) and I have shared a few life-defining moments. The bar here was the scene of several early dates and... More >>

• Maggiano’s Little Italy

  published September 7, 2006

  The next round of Nobel Peace Prizes may finally be money for the Institute of Drinking Studies. Nearly every Saturday and Sunday morning, we find... More >>

• Noodles & Company

  published August 31, 2006

  When was the last time you had one of those days that made you wish you'd never been born? You know the kind of day I'm talking about. You get up... More >>

• Charlie Brown’s Bar and Grill

  published August 24, 2006

  When a guy wants to enjoy a productive relationship with a woman (meaning sex with some regularity), he sometimes has to do things he normally... More >>

• Roughing It

  published August 17, 2006

  Although I hate mass-market American "beer" -- aka the root of all evil -- there are times when drinking anything else would be wrong. And camping... More >>

• Don’s Club Tavern

  published August 10, 2006

  Progress is not always a good thing. I liked it better when draft beer only came from a keg, not a bottle or can. I remember when telephones were... More >>

• Olive Garden Italian Restaurant

  published August 3, 2006

  Suburban life is tough these days. Although we were hooligans growing up, the only things that could get us in trouble hadn't changed much since... More >>

• Wahoo’s Fish Taco

  published July 27, 2006

  The Food and Drug Administration should start requiring warning labels, or at least ingredient lists, on all margaritas. This would undoubtedly... More >>

• Tavern Downtown

  published July 20, 2006

  We were ready for some simple fun after a month of international rivalries during which we'd suffered through: more than 1.2 trillion scoreless... More >>

• Angelo’s Pizza Parlor

  published July 13, 2006

  I'm more than a little surprised that we made it to the movies the other night. Typically, when we plan an Institute Movie Night, we are no more... More >>