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Best Of 2004

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Best Of :: People & Places

Best Ode to Empty Space

Robert Bach, national director of market analysis for Grubb & Ellis, appeared at an annual industrial- and office-property owners' meeting in Denver to deliver the bad news about this city's commercial-vacancy rate, which isn't expected to reach 10 percent until 2008. And that's going down. To soften the blow, he offered this song:

At the start of '03, landlords knew

it would be rough.

Tenants large and small,

there just weren't enough.

Yet the construction pipeline kept

delivering new space,

While leasing and absorption

could not keep pace . . .

Office landlords suffered and moaned,

but there was a silver lining.

Low interest rates and roller-coaster stocks

kept buyers pining

For Class A buildings with solid

rent rolls

And little rollover risk, that would be

investor's gold.

But what of '04, what does our crystal ball

tell us?

The market will improve, but not enough

to make tenants jealous

Of landlords (who) won't have much

bargaining power

Until 2005, when the market will be

less dour

So tenants make your best deals soon,

Lock in long-term low rates and whistle

a happy tune.

In 2004, landlords, you will begin to

climb out of your hole,

And you'll all feel better in 2005

When the Broncos win the Super Bowl.

Best New Slogan for Denver

Metro boosters keep fretting that the rest of the world doesn't really understand Denver. Outsiders see those nice pictures of Aspen, and they assume this city's in the mountains, too. Or they watch all the coverage of Colorado's assorted sex-assault scandals -- the Air Force Academy, Kobe Bryant, CU recruiting -- and they assume that topography isn't the only thing elevated here. (Colorado: What happens here stays in the national news for years to come.) Isn't it about time to mix those two not entirely incorrect assumptions together with our one tried-and-true, if unofficial, slogan -- "The Mile High City" -- for a brand that's fun, friendly and just a bit frisky?


Best New Slogan for Denver

Metro boosters keep fretting that the rest of the world doesn't really understand Denver. Outsiders see those nice pictures of Aspen, and they assume this city's in the mountains, too. Or they watch all the coverage of Colorado's assorted sex-assault scandals -- the Air Force Academy, Kobe Bryant, CU recruiting -- and they assume that topography isn't the only thing elevated here. (Colorado: What happens here stays in the national news for years to come.) Isn't it about time to mix those two not entirely incorrect assumptions together with our one tried-and-true, if unofficial, slogan -- "The Mile High City" -- for a brand that's fun, friendly and just a bit frisky?

Best Song About a New Slogan for Denver
Kenny Be

Tom Clark, head of the Chamber of Commerce's new eco-devo unit, the Metro Denver Economic Development Corporation, isn't all about numbers. He can rock and roll, too, as evidenced by his song "Branding," performed by his band, TC and the Destroyers (celebrity edition), at Denver 360, the city's summit on marketing in February:

There's a Mayor, by the name of Hick,

Said, "Denver, you need a brand-new shtick.

"Find some words, take your pick

And send the world the news."

Find the words, like "Mile High Smile"

"Queen City," or "Denver by a Mile."

There's "Altitude With Some Attitude"

Which one will we choose?

The flaks say, "Branding, you're a fine word"

We'll find the new words, you'll see

How about "DenverŠa great place to be"?

In Vegas, it's wine, women and song

Chippendales, strippers dressed in thongs

In Denver, we still know it's wrong

to "Come to the Cabaret"

Let's make it edgy, make it cool

We've got the nation's best "Party School"

We're where Brother Doug Bruce Rules!

There's no taxes to pay!

We got great fires, we give great drought

Eco-tourism's what it's all about

Let's all stand up and shout

"Our water's owned by L.A.!"

The flaks say, "Branding, you're a fine word"

We'll find the new words, you'll see.

How about "DenverŠbetter than therapy"?

We got traffic, ain't got no trains

We're even "Colorful" if it ever rains

We still attract all the nation's brains

We just hope they'll stay!

At night, when Denver's LoDo is packed

Mayor Hick revs up all the acts

With his changer, he brings us back

To the LoDo we all love.

Got no incentives, except life with quality

Mountain views are part of your salary

We're here today to change the economy

And be a Mile High above the rest.

The flaks say, "Branding, you're a fine word"

We'll find the new words, you'll see

How about "DenverŠa great place to be"?

Best Song About a New Slogan for Denver

Tom Clark, head of the Chamber of Commerce's new eco-devo unit, the Metro Denver Economic Development Corporation, isn't all about numbers. He can rock and roll, too, as evidenced by his song "Branding," performed by his band, TC and the Destroyers (celebrity edition), at Denver 360, the city's summit on marketing in February:

There's a Mayor, by the name of Hick,

Said, "Denver, you need a brand-new shtick.

"Find some words, take your pick

And send the world the news."

Find the words, like "Mile High Smile"

"Queen City," or "Denver by a Mile."

There's "Altitude With Some Attitude"

Which one will we choose?

The flaks say, "Branding, you're a fine word"

We'll find the new words, you'll see

How about "DenverŠa great place to be"?

In Vegas, it's wine, women and song

Chippendales, strippers dressed in thongs

In Denver, we still know it's wrong

to "Come to the Cabaret"

Let's make it edgy, make it cool

We've got the nation's best "Party School"

We're where Brother Doug Bruce Rules!

There's no taxes to pay!

We got great fires, we give great drought

Eco-tourism's what it's all about

Let's all stand up and shout

"Our water's owned by L.A.!"

The flaks say, "Branding, you're a fine word"

We'll find the new words, you'll see.

How about "DenverŠbetter than therapy"?

We got traffic, ain't got no trains

We're even "Colorful" if it ever rains

We still attract all the nation's brains

We just hope they'll stay!

At night, when Denver's LoDo is packed

Mayor Hick revs up all the acts

With his changer, he brings us back

To the LoDo we all love.

Got no incentives, except life with quality

Mountain views are part of your salary

We're here today to change the economy

And be a Mile High above the rest.

The flaks say, "Branding, you're a fine word"

We'll find the new words, you'll see

How about "DenverŠa great place to be"?

Best Slogan for a Colorado City That Isn't Denver

When you're a tiny town in the least-populated county in Colorado, you have to make the most of what you have. And for Lake City, that's not just spectacular scenery. It's Lake City's most notorious short-term resident, Alfred Packer, the "Colorado Cannibal" charged with eating five of his traveling companions while stranded on Slumgullion Pass in 1874. The truth of that tale -- like the correct spelling of Packer's first name -- is still a matter of some dispute. But slap Packer's glum mug on a T-shirt over the slogan "Eat Your Heart Out!," as Lake City has just done, and throw an Alferd Packer Days festival complete with skull-throwing and "mystery meat" barbecue -- and you've got a marketing campaign that tourists will eat right up. The rest is history.


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Best Ode to Empty Space: Robert Bach, Grubb & Ellis

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