I couldn't help but feel bad for Smurfette the few times I saw The Smurfs. Being the only girl in a gang of dipshits must be insufferable at times – just ask my mom. But you can take solace in knowing that Smurfette has had the most success off the screen, transitioning from TV to Denver dispensaries as one of the most fragrant cannabis strains I've ever come across.
I first laid eyes on Smurfette at the Joint in West Highland, which has one of the more extensive and stanky menus in town. The first sniff was akin to seeing the love of your life for the first time: instant attraction and maybe a little salivation. Cap'n Crunch Berries danced around my head as I drove home with my blood racing and my mouth watering. Sometimes commercialization is a good thing.
Smurfette's mysterious origins are as alluring as its aroma. At every dispensary where I've found it, employees have said that they didn’t know its genetics and that it came from a wholesale grower they declined to name. I did locate a chain of pot shops in Oregon that carries Smurfette, but it lists the lineage as Northern Lights, Skunk #1 and a Dutch sativa, which are the genetics for White Smurf, a sativa-leaning strain with more floral notes. Smurfette's cereal-like smell and peaceful high just don't match up with that description.
Although my push for a scratch ’n' sniff cover of Smurfette for this week's paper didn't pan out, I hope my description does the strain justice. A melody of blueberries, strawberries, candied apples and a bit of piney wood create an unforgettable smell that I'd put right up there with Alien Rock Candy or Tangie. However, the strain's taste, though similar to its seductive scent, is more like the high: subdued yet substantial, with calming notes that melt worries and discomfort.
While Smurfette is a relatively new strain on the scene, it can be found at a number of dispensaries in Denver. Euflora, Lightshade, Nature's Best and the Joint all carry or have recently carried the strain, and the cuts I've had from Lightshade, Nature's Best and the Joint all have the same sweet, doughy smell of Crunch Berries and laid-back effects.
To Papa (or Mama) Smurf, whoever you are, be proud of your daughter. She's one uplifting gal.
Looks: Buds range from cone-shaped to foxtailed, keeping a compact structure despite rangy, twisted calyxes. Although its lining of bright trichomes is similar to White Smurf’s, Smurfette's color is a darker forest green.
Smell: Scents of apples, berries and brown sugar come together for a sweet mixture that pairs well with a subtle, woody back end.
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Flavor: While a bit less intense than its smell, Smurfette's flavor is still fruity and savory, with a blend of berry and honey that makes for a candy-like flavor with a kush-y aftertaste, sort of like an infused gummy.
Effects: Smurfette's high is pretty even, keeping users at a consistent level of serenity with a slight lack of concentration. While it's not an immediate downer, its visual augmentation is great for winding down if you're not quite ready for bed. Eating and sleeping disorders, anxiety, stress and muscle soreness could all be treated with Smurfette's effects, and the strain would also help with boring movies and scenic road trips.
Home grower's take: “I haven't been able to find out much about it, either. It looks like it might have some Blueberry qualities because of its distinct flavor and relaxing effects. I've also heard Northern Lights could be in the mix, but that's probably just because of White Smurf – but [Smurfette] does have some small piney flavors, and it slows you down like Northern Lights, too. I just think it's too sweet and relaxing to be White Smurf. Maybe it's in the lineage, or [Smurfette] is a phenotype or something. But I'm almost positive it's a different strain.”
Is there a strain you'd like to see profiled? E-mail firstname.lastname@example.org.