The 53rd ceremony to determine the absolute best music! It's Grammy time, people, when we all leap off our couches to buy that Lady Gaga album from 2009 once we all realize it's the best album of 2010. But seriously: the only people paying attention to who wins are people betting on it. What really matters are the telecast performances -- that's why we'll be tuning in. The lineup is more-or-less finalized at this point, and it's ripe with possibility: The Arcade Fire, Raphael Saadiq, and, yes, Kermit the Frog. Below, we rundown the five collaborative performances we'll be rooting for and (mostly) not getting.
5. Barbra Streisand and Drake Ideally, we'd love to have Streisand collaborating with someone like Waka Flocka Flame, but the Grammy's typically don't invite performances from people like Waka. The closest we'll get this year is Drake, which is pretty far away indeed. Still, Drake's got a sex ballad or or twenty in his catalogue, and are you telling us you wouldn't wear out a YouTube video of this happening for real?
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4. The Arcade Fire and Bruno Mars Let's take one of the most serious, socially skeptical rock bands of the past decade and give them a hook man who cannot wipe the goofy smile off his face even when he's posing for the cops. We're thinking you take "Grenade," which at least has some melodrama for Win and company to work with and segue into "Rococo."
3. Mick Jagger and Justin Bieber Together, they make one normal-aged pop star! We're thinking "Brown Sugar" is the way to go. As much as we'd love to say we think Bieber would fall on his face here, we're starting to think he's secretly a thirty-five year old genius inhabiting the body of a teenager. Hasn't really made a misstep so far, and the stuff he's done to promote Never Say Never almost makes us want to see it. Not quite, but still: That's about as high a compliment as we can fathom giving.
2. Lady Antebellum and Eminem The most simpering, harmless rock band since... the Monkees? meets one of the most fiery voices in mainstream music. Eminem may have infiltrated suburbia like never before in 2010, but let's not forget who we're talking about here. Basically how we envision this going is Lady Antebellum starts playing "Hey, Soul Sister" and Eminem beats the crap out of them.
1. Cee Lo Green with Gwyneth Paltrow and The Jim Henson Company Puppets Oh wait, that's actually happening.