In one of my favorite Charles Bukowski poems, "The Insane Always Loved Me," he wrote about how the unwanted, cowards and misanthropes would often attach themselves to him. I can relate. I've had many a nut sit down next to me at a bar, like the guy who made bird noises after his third rum and Coke and then passed out. Or the old guy with the beard who'd somehow lost three of his fingertips and, years later, fell asleep in bed with a cigarette in his hand and died in a fire. Or the gullible guy who actually believed it when I told him I was a professional wrestler who got paid two grand a match to get in the ring and lose to guys like Hulk Hogan. Or the gal who told me about these midget twin Puerto Rican hookers who supposedly hooked up with some famous actor and somehow threw a garden hose and furry rodent into the mix. Or the crazy gal I met recently at Arvada's 12 Volt Tavern.
But last week, I wasn't in the mood for entertaining the insane. So on a buddy's recommendation, I went to Harry's (818 17th Street), on the first floor of the Magnolia Hotel. As I walked into the bar, which is decked out in '50s futuristic retro like the Jetsons' living room, I spotted a couple of groups who looked relatively sane, like they were probably in town on business. I grabbed a seat at the bar, got a beer from the friendly, funny bartender, and finally started talking to the guy next to me, who said he lived across the street at the Bank Lofts. Turns out that this place is a hangout not just for travelers, but for neighbors who appreciate hanging at a bar nearby — particularly one with fringe benefits. He told me that the weekends were nuts with all the tourists, including out-of-town gals looking for one-night flings.
"What do you think about those chicks sitting by the window?" I asked.
"Oh, them," he said, looking over his shoulder. "I think they live downtown. I already tried a while back. Shot down."
So, yeah, dude seemed pretty cool and even mentally balanced. My freak magnet must not work at Harry's.
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
Club scout: Baroptic.com, a two-year-old company that offers live video feeds of Denver clubs, just added four more — Treo, Rise, Theorie and the Foundry in Boulder — to a lineup that already included the Church, Vinyl, Shelter, Sutra and Tryst. The company, which is based in Denver, has installed cameras in Boston, and early next year will expand into Scottsdale, San Diego, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Miami and Atlanta. In the meantime, check out the action on this site, then head out into the night.
DJs Low Key and Sounds Supreme just switched their Solution underground hip-hop nights at the Funky Buddha (776 Lincoln Street) from Fridays to Thursdays. To kick off the move, they'll bring back their Chicken and Waffles Party on Thursday, December 13. You can also now catch the duo, along with DJ Musa, spinning hip-hop at Vinyl (1082 Broadway) during Refresh Fridays. Every week they'll bring in hip-hop acts from out of town, like the Cool Kids on Friday, December 14, and CunninLynguists on Friday, December 21.
Finally, congrats to Mezcal (3230 East Colfax Avenue), which celebrates its fourth anniversary — and serving a total of 268,563 margaritas — on Friday, December 14, and Saturday, December 15. During an extended happy hour that will run from noon to 7 p.m. both days, you can get a killer marg or a mojito for $4, and at 7 p.m. Friday, there'll also be live music by Tito del Barrio Malaga.