The gentlemen of Ultra Music Festival 2013

Photo by George Martinez

By Victor Gonzalez

Gay, straight, bi or simply rolling face, if you're a man with abs like Jesus and just enough fabric to cover your genitals, there was nothing wrong with showing off your manhood in Miami this past weekend. It's Ultra Music Festival, baby! And the Gym, Tan, Molly fraternal order of male ravers are loud, proud and hanging 'round in their Diesel underpants, Umbro soccer shorts and furry boots. Here are the top ten nearly naked raver bros spotted at Ultra 2013.

See also: - Have you seen Molly? She's been everywhere lately - Photos: Ultra Music Festival 2013 - Weekend One, Day One - Photos: Ultra Music Festival 2013 - Weekend One, Day Two

Ho! Ho! Ho! Y'all have heard of Santa Claus, right? This is his raving doppelgänger, Santa Cock.

YMCA The Village People called; they need the headdress back, papo.  

A Formal Affair Ultra Dress Policy: Black tie, no shirt.

PANDA-monium This bro's spirit animal must be exhibitionist panda. Cute boots, dude.  

Full Chub
Is that a banana in your pants? Or are you just happy to be at Ultra? Well played, Chubs.

Cojones Ballsy outfit, bro!  

Fanny Package We actually asked this bro to "act natural" for the picture.

Furry With that much body hair, why bother wearing clothes?  

Captain No Pants Who needs pants when you've got a captain's hat, sunglasses and a sweet golf cart?

Photo by George Martinez

Ultra Formal Always remember to match your tie to your kandi kid accessories.

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