Okay, we'll just go ahead and admit it: We're simpletons, easily amused. A few Christmases ago, when former Dork frontman Bryan Knoebel rigged his Arvada house with lights that illuminated in-synch with "Welcome to the Jungle," we were endlessly fascinated, and fantasied about one-upping him by outfitting our house with lights to that flashed to the tune of "Reign In Blood" or something equally as brutal. Alas, we had neither the time nor the patience to make that little dream a reality.
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So seeing the video of Disney imagineer Ric Turner's house, which we've now watched like a hundred times since being tipped off by our pal Magic Cyclops, leaves us feeling about a million times more dejected -- especially when we learned just how much work went into the creating this unreal light display. (You should see what the guy does for Halloween.) It's a good thing we don't live anywhere near Turner's Burbank neighborhood. Lord knows, we'd never get anything done. We'd all be standing around like the dyed-in-the-wool doofuses we are, marveling at the damn thing, muttering stuff like, "Ah, man, that is so rad! Do it again, will ya? Please, kid!" We don't remember Eric Johnson's "Cliffs of Dover" ever seeming so cool. Do you?