We don't know with metaphysical certitude that the Christopher Lites who was arrested in Boulder over the weekend on a charge of pedaling his bicycle under the influence is the same Chris Lites whose Facebook profile photo depicts a bizarre version of the Gary Busey family (it's on view below). But let's just say we can't help wondering.
According to the Boulder Police Department blotter, officers responded to the area of Arapahoe and 30th around 12:37 a.m., during a time when the city had been pelted by precipitation for hours, after receiving a word of a collision involving a car (a Toyota Camry, reports the Boulder Daily Camera) and a bicycle whose rider allegedly tried to leave the scene before cops arrived.
Neither the bike, which was traveling in the crosswalk but didn't have a light, nor the car sustained significant damage, the Camera notes, but the cyclist, identified as Lites, age thirty, had minor injuries that required hospitalization. The arrest documents also state that he had a wee bit of alky-haul in his system. He's said to have failed a field sobriety test a full two hours after the accident, and when given a breath test three hours post-crash, he still managed to blow a .207, more than twice the legal limit.
Which is the kind of thing that can happen if a person has downed ten drinks, as Lites apparently admitted to police that he'd consumed.
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
In the end, the Camry driver wasn't ticketed, while Lites was cited for suspicion of DUI. He was briefly jailed, but subsequently released -- but at least it looks as if he had a nice family waiting for him upon his return.
Follow and like the Michael Roberts/Westword Facebook page.
More from our Videos archive: "Video: Matt Hefferon issues complaint against Fort Collins cop who shoved him."