Local fave Duane Chapman, aka Dog the Bounty Hunter, will reportedly be the focus of an E! True Hollywood Story episode on Monday, May 24 -- and judging by the quotes released to date, it should be a laugh riot.
For instance, here's what Dog says about the days when he was still catting around: "I went through 36 girls... and one day baby Lyssa said the prayer and said, 'God, would you please not let Dad f*** the nanny.' She's like eight, right? And I'm like, 'Oh my God.'"
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Fortunately, he found his love match in his wife, Beth. He describes their meeting like so: "I'm sitting in my office and I look up and there are two of the most beautiful breasts in a shirt with a bra that I had ever seen."
Get the points?