I'm just going to come out and say it: Jo Myers, formerly of KOSI's morning show, has a third nipple. Know how I know that? I read her book, Good To Go, The ABCs of Death and Dying.
The chapter called "D, Donate Your Body to Science," begins like this: "I've donated my body to science. The paperwork has been completed. My cadaver card, prominently displayed in my wallet, is laminated. Medical students may ponder my anal retentiveness along with my auxiliary nipple."
Come again? "You read that correctly," she continues. "My auxiliary nipple. I have three."
Wow. That's bold. But the personal anecdotes don't end there.
In "A is for Attitude," we learn that she met her elderly neighbor Ruth, who she helped care for before Ruth's death, after her first husband threw her out of the house one night following an argument. In "B, Bones of Contention," she tells us her brother got drunk on bourbon the night their father died and cried himself to sleep, hugging Dad's military flag. She writes about fights with her sisters, awkwardness with her brother-in-law and giving an enema (not to herself).
It's these real-life details that make Myers' book, which she quit her radio job to write, so readable. She uses them to talk about touchy subjects such as squabbles over family heirlooms, how to convince an ailing loved one it's time to give up their independence and how to find closure after someone dies. Despite the uncomfortable subject matter and a few somber moments, the book's overall tone is light. The main message: Planning what you want to happen when you die before you die makes it easier for everyone.
I met Myers at Sunday's grand opening of the Highline Circle of Life Center in Thornton, a venue that's half funeral home, half wedding chapel. She was giving away copies of her book and when I got back to the office, I flipped through it. The bit about the triple nipple caught my eye -- what a ballsy way to talk about body donation! -- and I e-mailed her to see if we could chat about why she decided to be so er, revealing.
"I felt it had to be real," she subsequently told me. "I just felt like, well, I'll just strip it all bare."
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That she did. The third-nipple bit goes on for all of page 46. She says her extra nip looks like a birthmark, "but it has all the features of the other two, sensitivity and plumbing, if you know what I mean." If you don't, she goes on to tell you: When she had her first child, lactation was painful. That's part of the reason she says she decided to donate her body to the Colorado Anatomical Board, so that future mothers with more than two boobs can benefit from the study of hers.
Myers is funny when she talks about her excess anatomy, if not a little bit uncomfortable. (In the beginning of our conversation, she refers to her third nipple as "that going on," as in, "Yes, I have that going on.") She says she briefly felt wary about including it in her book after a police officer she interviewed about death-related stuff commented about it.
"After the cop said, 'I can't believe you're telling the world you have three boobs,' I thought, why am I doing that?," Myers says. "But then I said, 'It's funny,' and if it makes people remember (to pre-plan for their deaths), good."
If it makes you want to order a copy of her book, it's available on her website at www.GoodToGoTheBook.com or at the Tattered Cover book stores. If you'd like to see Myers in person -- with no guarantees that she'll show off her anatomy, Girls Gone Wild-style -- she'll be in Denver at the HeartLight Center on April 28 at 7 p.m. for "A Night of Sharing -- What Not to Say to People in Grief."