Wheat Ridge Yardivore Real Name: Jocelyn H. Chilvers; Occupation: Garden Coach; Suburb of operations: Wheat Ridge; Hair: Weeded; Eyes: Watered
Suburban superhero skills: Like all Wheat Ridgers, Yardivore's life force is augmented by art, gardening and constant garden-variety nagging. As a result, she is immune to aging and invulnerable to conventional forms of soulless suburban apathy...
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
Yardivore is more accomplished in the discipline of projecting art and garden energy than any other resident of Wheat Ridge. While some of this energy can be seen in her yard and home, most of her yard force is aimed at clueless Front Range Gardeners, who she mind-controls through info-packed website blog updates. Her maximum effective range includes complete landscape design services, which allow her to engage in simple telepathic communications with plant forms and to scan the superficial garden misconceptions of any client's mind less adept than her own.
Yardivore is also known to be capable of initiating the year-long creation of the Uni-Life, the collective energy force resulting from the merging of yard energy into winter quilting projects. She does this by taking inspiration from organic forms and interpreting them visually in woven fiber while someone named Jim watches football.
Due to her tendency toward being succinct, it is suspected that Yardivore may have other superhero abilities which have not yet been revealed.