"After the Exit," Michael Roberts, December 6
Sheesh. Other than the Christm...oops!...holiday gift ideas, the December 6 issue of Westword was packed full of more tearjerkers than an economy-sized box of Kleenex. First there was the usual Ask a Mexican bitch about how the Mexican food here isn't as good as Mama usta make back on the other side of the river. Golly. Do ya 'pose there's a way to fixt that? Then there's the terrible news that Coors won't be bottling its Christm...damn!... holiday beer this year. Next, I'm told to feel bad because felons in halfway houses don't get free medical care like I do. Followed by my personal favorite: a(nother) sob story by Michael Roberts about ink-stained wretches out on their fat asses because nobody reads leftist rags like the Denver Post and the Rocky Mountain News these days.
Couple or three words of Christm...shit!...holiday cheer for these unemployed members of the Fourth Estate: Allentown, Pennsylvania; Pontiac, Michigan; Houston, Texas; Pueblo, Colorado. You know, I don't ever remember reading about some mill or rig rat who'd picked up some "consulting" work or was "laying the groundwork for projects down the road" back in the 1970s or '80s. Yeah, it maybe doesn't have the same panache as shouting "Copy!," but asking "Paper or plastic?" will still pay the bills.
Suck it up, you puling pussies. Then go to Craigslist or Jobs.com and find honest work.
"The White Stuff," Adam Cayton-Holland, December 6
I moved to Chicago from Denver about a year and a half ago, and because I think Adam Cayton-Holland is wildly funny and intelligent about 50 percent of the time, I continue to read Westword online every once in a while. The diversity-training guide was most definitely in the funny-and-intelligent category. But Adam really needs to google Chicago's diversity-training videos. They blow away Denver's attempt to be humorous in a bigoted kind of way.
"Out of Bounds," Luke Turf, November 29
When I worked at a Marriott hotel in the '80s, one of our cardinal rules was that you couldn't be on the premises after a shift ended. If you wanted to eat at the restaurant or stay at the hotel, you had to get special permission. I don't understand how this subject was never mentioned in either the Justin Jahn or Kobe Bryant cases. Both involved employees going to a room after work was over.
An acquaintance who used to work for a Four Seasons told me that the front-desk clerks weren't even allowed to date guests off-premises. I don't know how this was practically enforced, but it shows the parameters of behavior and protections built into the clerk/guest relationship by the hotel.
I found "Out of Bounds" interesting and I hope that the guy prevails in his case against the accuser.
"The Inn Crowd," Juliet Wittman, December 6
I loved Juliet Wittman's review of White Christmas. She showed a thorough knowledge of the material, and I had the sensation that I'd just read a letter from a dear friend. Thank you for her reviews!
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"Smothered," Adam Cayton-Holland, November 29
Wow, what a nice article on a landmark burrito joint. I, too, have visited the Chubby's on 38th, and the experience isn't the same at any other Chubby's in the city (except for the paper plates).
Mrs. Cordova comes from Walsenburg, a beautiful area of Colorado. I know that area well, as my family grew up in La Veta, in Huerfano County. There is something in her words of family that resonates in me as something my own mother went through. My prayers for her family — all 150-plus of them — and a green-chile salute to their future!