Mark Udall lovefest and ten other ways Congress could be more civil
On Wednesday, President Obama called for a new era of civility in light of the tragic Jared Loughner-Gabrielle Giffords shooting in Tucson, while Colorado Senator Mark Udall suggested that the members of Congress sit together for the State of the Union address rather than separate by political party.
It's all very nice, very reasonable. But until the culture of Washington changes, a new era of civility is, sadly, unlikely. In the meantime, here are ten other steps Congress could take to make our elected officials nicer to one another.
10) Bi-partisan bus trips to Monticello -- chaperoned by their parents.
9) Everybody gets to be speaker of the house for one day.
8) Democrats introduce Republican bills and Republicans introduce Democratic Bills.
7) Zoloft in the cloakroom, in the cafeteria, in the tea, and in the drinking water.
6) Bring Your Dog to Congress day.
5) If you use inflammatory rhetoric, your bill proposals lose one porkbelly project.
4) Everyone has to hug John Boehner each time he cries.
3) Everyone has to cry.
2) You only get to speak if you raise your hand.
1) Desks replaced by yoga mats.
More from our Politics archive: "Tom Mauser, Mark Udall and the gun-show loophole: Why no deal?"
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you’ll never miss Westword's biggest stories.
- Reader: Landlords Are Overcharging Marijuana Businesses Because They Can
Thu., Sep. 3, 7:00pm
Fri., Sep. 4, 7:00pm
Sat., Sep. 5, 12:00am
Sat., Sep. 5, 12:30pm
- Remembering the Denver Wax Museum and Nine More Long-Gone Local Landmarks
- Dear Mexican: Was Jimi Hendrix Part Mexican?