Below, find twenty tweets sure to freak out parents of students attending Colorado high schools, many of which are specifically named in the messages. We don't vouch for the accuracy of the posts, which could be entirely fictional as far as we know. In fact, it's probably a good idea for parents to assume they are. They'll sleep sounder that way.
See also: Photos: Top Ten CU Boulder Confessions, Back to School Edition
Number 20:"The senior class is just one giant gang bang"
-Palmer Ridge High School
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 28, 2014
Number 19:
"There isn't a bathroom I haven't snorted coke in"
-Cherokee Trail High School
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) June 7, 2014
Number 18:
"Kid showed up drunk to a football game and tried to fight our principal."
-St Mary's HS
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 14, 2014
Number 17:
"Got so drunk that I mushroom stamped 5 people and took a shit on a girls car."
-Palmer High School
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 2, 2014
Continue to keep counting down Colorado HS Confess tweets guaranteed to freak out parents.
Number 16:
"Everybody left a kegger to go do some heroin"
-Woodland Park HS
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 6, 2014
Number 15:
"Pregnancy is spreading around like wildfire here"
-Fruita Monument HS
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 4, 2014
Number 14:
"The new sophomore slut is stealing everyone's bras from the locker room."
-Grand Valley HS
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 20, 2014
Number 13
Two shots before, two at half, and a bottle on the way home."
-Poudre HS
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 20, 2014
Continue to keep counting down Colorado HS Confess tweets guaranteed to freak out parents.
Number 12:
"A sophomore yelled 'fuck her right in the pussy' during a spirit assembly and got a huge standing ovation."
-Woodland Park HS
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 16, 2014
Number 11:
"I've seen every girl in my school naked on about 10 different guy's phones"
-Canon City High School
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 1, 2014
Number 10:
"The hottest sophomore made $500 by selling her nudes at lunch to everyone."
-Eaton HS
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 15, 2014
Number 9:
"A girl faked a car accident and amnesia so a guy would feel bad for her and ask her to prom."
-Windsor HS
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 14, 2014
Continue to keep counting down Colorado HS Confess tweets guaranteed to freak out parents.
Number 8:
"All we do is smoke weed"
-Summit County High School
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) August 31, 2014
Number 7:
"Kids at our school had an orgy on the golf course during a party."
-Lewis Palmer High School
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) August 28, 2014
Number 6:
"It's hard to turn the corner in the hallways without seeing girls making out."
-Longmont HS
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 8, 2014
Number 5:
"I took a poop on the toilet paper roll. So naturally people gathered around and took pictures of it."
-Palmer Ridge HS
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) September 8, 2014
Continue to keep counting down Colorado HS Confess tweets guaranteed to freak out parents.
Number 4:
"Got shitfaced at King Soopers so I stole a watermelon and ate an entire loaf of garlic bread"
-Discovery Canyon
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) May 24, 2014
Number 3:
"Some girl gave a guy head on top of her best friends past out body"
-Evergreen High School
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) August 31, 2014
Number 2:
"The only drug dealers we have are 8th graders"
-Denver Jewish High School
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) June 7, 2014
Number 1:
"Some kid got so drunk, he had sex with a jar of Queso."
-Columbine High School
— Colorado HS Confess (@ConfessionsCOHS) May 29, 2014
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