What do you get when you cross a wanted criminal, underage girls, methamphetamines, wigs, guns, body armor, the Democratic National Convention and The Bodyguard (with Whitney Houston and Kevin Costner)?
A plot to kill Barack Obama.
And yet, police say the plans to assassinate the Democratic presidential nominee discussed by Nathan Johnson, Shawn Adolf and Tharin Gartrell were so poorly conceived that the men aren’t even going to be charged with conspiracy.
The story goes roughly like this:
The three men were doing meth with at least one juvenile girl on August 23 in a Hyatt hotel in southeast Denver – where they mistakenly though Obama was staying -- when they came up with a plot to hide a rifle in a TV camera (as in The Bodyguard) and sneak into one of the DNC events.
Things soon went awry. The next day, Gartrell was pulled over by Aurora police, who say they found two rifles with scopes, body armor, walkie-talkies, wigs, a cell phone and meth-making equipment inside Gartrell’s rented truck.
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Although the FBI initially wanted to charge the three men for conspiring to kill Obama, U.S. Attorney for Colorado Troy Eid later said there was never any real threat to the candidate and called the men "a bunch of meth heads,” according to a news report.
The three Shmucks have been charged with possession of a firearm by a felon, possession of body armor by a violent felon, possession of methamphetamine, and possession of methamphetamine with intent to distribute.
Read about other Shmucks in our Shmuck archive.