Top twelve Broncos fans you've probably met
For a small market located in a flyover state, Denver and its football fans have made a big name for themselves since the Denver Broncos team was born in 1960. From the fans who stormed the field on New Year's Day in 1978 to tear down the goal posts after the team went to its first Super Bowl, to those who have sold out the stadium 43 years in a row, to the ones who are making the long, cold, expensive trek to New York next week for Denver's seventh appearance in the big game, Bronco maniacs rival fans in any state.
And as the team heads toward its February 2 date with the Seattle Seahawks, football fanatics are coming out of the woodwork. You'll see them all — from those who honestly bleed orange and blue to those who are just pretending. Here's our rundown (illustrated by Noah Van Sciver) of the twelve most common types of Broncos fans.
The Hater The Hater puts himself out there as a huge Broncos fan, but he can't stop talking about how badly the team is going to do this Sunday — and every Sunday. He never gets tired of pointing out how the front office messed up the draft, how the coaches blew up the play-calling, how the Broncos have NO running game, no passing game, no defense and no special teams. In fact, the Hater is so down on the Broncos that you wonder why he even bothers.
The Optimist The Optimist always buys the latest jersey and newest hat, and he won't tolerate any talk about the chance that the Broncos could possibly lose this game — or any other game. Ever. To even mention team weaknesses or problems is sacrilege. Criticize the team, and the Optimist will shoot you down — because if you harbor even the slightest doubt about the Broncos, then you're just not a real fan.
The Secret Fan This fan pretends not to like football because he hangs with hipsters or intellectuals who don't appreciate the sport's "ritualized reenactment of violence" and "patriarchal male domination," but you'll still find the Secret Fan catching a glimpse, or two or three, of the game on the tiny TV in the trendy coffee shop or dive bar where he's sipping a beverage. And that's not Instagram he's checking on his smartphone — it's the score. He might even be wearing Broncos underwear.
The Conflicted Fan Born in a different state, the Conflicted Fan loves Colorado and thus the Broncos, so she dutifully wears a Broncos jersey. But she also has an allegiance to her home town and the friends and family who are still there, so she wears that team's hat, or maybe that team's T-shirt under her Broncos jersey. Of course, this just ends up making everyone mad at her.
The Overachiever The Overachiever takes leave of his senses when the Broncos make the playoffs, deciding — against the wishes of his wife, his neighbors and everyone else — to paint his house or his car orange, to get a tattoo of the team logo, and to name his kids Peyton and Demaryius. The Overachiever claims to have no regrets. But little Demaryius might.
The Tebow Enthusiast This fan appreciates Peyton Manning for his amazing abilities, but still feels like the Broncos would be just as good with Timmy at the top. A rare breed now that Manning has shown his worth, the Tebow Enthusiast steadfastly wears her Number 15 Tebow jersey every Sunday and simply shrugs her shoulders and flashes a sheepish grin when people ask why.Next Page
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