Top twenty reasons why you don't think Colorado sucks elephant balls
Our post spotlighting one hater's thirteen reasons why Colorado sucks elephant balls triggered an absolute avalanche of reader reaction. Plenty of comments were memorable, but here are our top twenty reasons why you don't think Colorado sucks elephant balls, illustrated with images from not one but two past collections of Colorado pride tattoos.
Chelsea Strauch writes:
Maybe the close minded bigot should get out more. The snow gives us fun things to do. Mountains are a stones throw away, lots of places in the flatlands too. And he seems like one of the rude racist people. Nothing but kindness, its all about the company you keep.
Richard Fowler writes:
Several of the things he hates are the things I love about Colorado and my 12 years here. AND there is TONS to do every day of the week!
Leah Nichols writes:
I'm pretty sure this dudeee confused Connecticut with Colorado. Colorado is the third best state to live in where as Connecticut is the 3rd worse to live in. Dudeee you're completely oblivious and have been locked in your mother's basement for too long. Come to Connecticut...you'll feel right at home. Ignorant people amuse me.
Joshua Jericho Williams writes:
Nothing to do? The worst winters? Takes forever to get to the mountains? One of the worst for crime? Perfect for people that only play video games and never leave the house? Ugly landscape? Was this shit just made up?
Jacqueline Clark writes:
Coming back to my home state from living in Louisiana (Fort Polk) for 7 years was one of the happiest moments of my life. This guy has some real narrow thinking....
Kennon Kellen writes:
What a db. Sorry I wasted time reading the moron's rants. Ugh. I've lived in Iowa, Minnesota, Georgia, Louisiana & California. There are a multitude of great reasons I planted roots here 20+ years ago. Sorry I'm not so bored to have the time to list them all. Rock on Colorado!
Catherine Davies writes:
My favorite part is how the drivers are terrible. 90% of people here aren't from here. Never seemed to be a problem before. This goes hand in hand with the traffic issue. This person must have been living on the eastern plains.
Ursula Blyth writes:
Yeah make sure to tell all the out of staters how bad Colo RAD o sucks!! Where was this dude living for 12 years, by the airport? Whateves, haters gonna hate! But I'm a Colorado girl for life!!!
Kirsten Lotvedt Rathmann writes:
I couldn't concentrate because of all the spelling and grammatical errors. If he thinks the roads are bad here, he should move to Milwaukee! Worst roads I have ever seen! (But overall a nice city.)
Michael Gardner writes:
I live in Colorado and love it, but this guy must have dealt with some a-holes and sorry. This guy has magnified a few bad incidents and ran with them. If Texas is better, you are welcome to go there. Sure the weed heads won't stop you.
Alex Amys writes:
Ha! In so many ways this guy is wrong! But in efforts to cut down on people moving here! Colorado does suck! Go home and tell your friends!
Jack Miller writes:
Although some minor points are made & true overall this guys is a disillusioned jack ass. Let him live in a cesspool like Detroit, New York or Atlanta. I am a transplant of 30 yrs & I say F*@k this guy, good riddance, take a few Texans & Californians with you when you go.
John Paul McCarroll writes:
Poor guy needs to get laid. The only valid point in that rant is the drivers. They are horrible here. Everyone seems to drive holding hands in slow motion here and they still manage to wreck. Other than that it's a pretty tolerable place to live.
What a douche! He clearly is from a shithole! I am from Philadelphia and moved to Denver from LA and spent time living in NYC this person clearly has never lived or grew up in a major large metro city in the US. None of what he mentioned in his rant is anywhere near legitimate!!!! If you don't like it then by all means PLEASE LEAVE! WE LOVE COLORADO! FYI I live here and don't smoke pot or do drugs!
Jacki Backner writes:
This guy obviously didn't do shit he was here or talk to anyone. Total horse shit, and quite comical. I have lived in Colorado for 14 years and wouldn't live anywhere else...hilarious.
Jason Winston Wright writes:
I was born and raised in England, lived there for over 30 years. I've been in Colorado for 8 years now so Trust me when I say this bloke is a bellend who doesn't know what he's talking about. Colorado is a gem.
Roger Morin writes:
I could put it in easier terms... I'm a beloved Texan, and absolutely love Colorado and my friends. Don't like it? Then leave... We don't want you polluting our way of life. Cheers sucker! ;O)
Aj Griffin writes:
For a shitty state we sure get a lot of tourists.
Mariella Irivarren writes:
As an outsider who was born in Canada, raised in South América, went to University in Colorado, visited over 12 states and currently lives in Toronto.... Colorado is pretty damn cool! and if I were to move back to the states Colorado would definitely be an option! All these problems he talks about happen in many other states and to much higher degrees. If this guy thinks there's nothing to do, he obviously doesn't get it and he's not made for a state like Colorado... He should move.
Stephen Felt writes:
Yes, this is all true. So please share this warning with everyone outside of Colorado so we can slow down the overcrowding and wallow in our 300 days of sunshine, low humidity and mountainous scenery.
Send your story tips to the author, Michael Roberts.
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you’ll never miss Westword's biggest stories.
- Marijuana Strain Review: Keplar at Golden Meds
Sat., Sep. 5, 7:30pm
Sun., Sep. 6, 2:00pm
Fri., Sep. 11, 7:00pm
Sat., Sep. 12, 1:00pm
- Reader: Saying Someone is Ugly and Has Big Boobs Isn't Sexist
- Foodies Mourn the Death of Le Central