Denver Cruisers taking city for an April 1 ride with 2013 "themes"

Update: Check out the real themes below. The first Denver Cruiser ride of the season won't be until May 15, but the themes for the next season were just posted. Or were they? "Because we got so much flak this winter for merely suggesting 'Homeless' as a theme to vote...

By Patricia Calhoun

April 1, 2013

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Update: Check out the real themes below. The first Denver Cruiser ride of the season won't be until May 15, but the themes for the next season were just posted. Or were they? "Because we got so much flak this winter for merely suggesting 'Homeless' as a theme to vote for on FB, we decided to dedicate our entire summer in an effort to help break the barriers of intolerance and misunderstanding about this worldwide epidemic," reads the note on the Denver Cruisers Facebook page. "We understand the challenges that some may have with this subject matter, however, it seems like a worthwhile effort to bring it more clearly to people's attention."

So every Wednesday, "we'll tackle the stereotypical attitudes frequently directed toward those without a place to hang their hats," the site promises. But since the info was just posted on April 1, we suspect the Cruisers are taking Denver for a ride. Keep reading for the alleged themes....

The Denver Cruisers 2013 Themes?

DATE THEME

May 16 Shopping Carts & Sleeping Bags

May 22 What Smells Like Piss?

May 29 Homeless Triangle

June 4 Alleys, Gutters & Garbage Cans

June 11 Holes in Everything

June 17 The Voice

June 24 Shit-Faced on Listerine

July 5 Soup Kitchen: Eat Like a King

July 12 @#$%^ Bitch, I'm Not Crazy!

July 19 Dreadlocks, Droopy Pants & Land Rovers (Boulder)

July 28 Bus Ticket to El Paso

August 2 Hey Buddy, Change A Spare?

August 9 Jesus Saves

August 17 Warm Showers & Free Soap

August 24 Can't You Hear Those Bells Too?

Sept 1 Aluminum

Sept 9 Who Stole Mah Shoooz?

Sept 15 Skid Marks & Semen Stains

Sept 17 Cardboard Houses

Sept 26 Hypothermia

We hear the real themes may be posted later today on the website, where you can already buy this year's license plate. In the meantime, What Denver Cruisers themes would you really like to see this year?

Update: As predicted, the Cruisers' have admitted their April fool's joke -- and announced the real themes for 2013. Take a look:

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Patricia Calhoun is editor-in-chief of Westword, the alt-weekly she co-founded in September 1977. She’s been inducted into the Colorado Press Association Hall of Fame, the Association of Alternative Newsmedia Hall of Fame and the Colorado Restaurant Association Hall of Fame. She’s also received dozens of local, state and national awards for writing, including first place for feature writing and first place for column writing with the Society of Professional Journalists. Patricia is a weekly commentator on Colorado Inside Out, PBS 12's public affairs roundtable, which has won two Emmys.

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