Best meal to test your intestinal fortitude 2000 | The Fort's Awful Offal Dinner | Best of Denver® | Best Restaurants, Bars, Clubs, Music and Stores in Denver | Westword
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Best meal to test your intestinal fortitude

The Fort's Awful Offal Dinner

Boo! Sam Arnold, culinary cutup and owner of The Fort, has been scaring diners for several years now with his annual Awful Offal dinner, a Halloween feast whose multiple courses feature many of the byproducts of butchering an animal. Talk about frightening: The lineup includes buffalo tongue, Rocky Mountain oysters (that's bull's balls to you), lamb brains, sweetbreads (the thymus gland), broiled kidneys and calf's liver. You'd think they'd have to pay you to eat this stuff, but the $50 per person event always sells out. Cat got your tongue? Arnold might serve it to you next October.

Best sock-it-to-ya drinks

Twin Dragon

You might see triple dragons if you imbibe too many drinks at this longtime Denver institution, but the next time you have a hankering for Chinese, what's the harm of washing down that lo mein with a Zombie or two? Since 1976, Twin Dragon -- an otherwise tasteful place -- has been trotting out exotic drinks in the most hilarious vessels. The Zombie, a combination of two kinds of rum, triple sec and fruit juices, comes in a skull; the Scorpion, a deadly mix of Amaretto, orgeat, triple sec, brandy, gold rum and "special fruit juices," arrives nearly spilling over the sides of a bowl held up by three fat little cranky-faced boys. Long gone are the days when the back room was set aside as a place where people could basically pass out on the floor after drinking too much, but the Twin Dragon will help you call a cab if things get fuzzy. Until then, though, grab your honey and a Love Potion, and ask to see the restaurant's selection of fortune cookies with dirty sayings.

Best sock-it-to-ya drinks

Twin Dragon

You might see triple dragons if you imbibe too many drinks at this longtime Denver institution, but the next time you have a hankering for Chinese, what's the harm of washing down that lo mein with a Zombie or two? Since 1976, Twin Dragon -- an otherwise tasteful place -- has been trotting out exotic drinks in the most hilarious vessels. The Zombie, a combination of two kinds of rum, triple sec and fruit juices, comes in a skull; the Scorpion, a deadly mix of Amaretto, orgeat, triple sec, brandy, gold rum and "special fruit juices," arrives nearly spilling over the sides of a bowl held up by three fat little cranky-faced boys. Long gone are the days when the back room was set aside as a place where people could basically pass out on the floor after drinking too much, but the Twin Dragon will help you call a cab if things get fuzzy. Until then, though, grab your honey and a Love Potion, and ask to see the restaurant's selection of fortune cookies with dirty sayings.

Best make-me-overs

Skylark Lounge

Mason Craig
A few months ago, a skinny Texan walked into the Skylark Lounge and ordered a round of Make-Me-Overs. "Make me wha'?" the bartender replied. Since the newly transplanted Longhorn lived just a penny-tossin' distance away from the watering hole, he figured he'd better teach the bartenders how to make his favorite party shot. The Texan told the story of the drink: It was created one night several years ago by a barman named Jeff at Emo's in Houston -- not to be confused with the bar's more famous location in Austin. Anyhoo, the Texan whistled, let's get down to business: two parts Crown Royal, two parts Seagram's 7, two parts Amaretto. Top it with a squirt of pineapple juice and shake it in a chilled mixer. Then serve it straight up. Then shoot it straight back. "Ooooweeee!" cried the Texan, expressing his approval. Ever since, the Skylark has been serving up round upon round of the tastiest shooters this side of the Bayou City. Ooooweeee!

Best make-me-overs

Skylark Lounge

A few months ago, a skinny Texan walked into the Skylark Lounge and ordered a round of Make-Me-Overs. "Make me wha'?" the bartender replied. Since the newly transplanted Longhorn lived just a penny-tossin' distance away from the watering hole, he figured he'd better teach the bartenders how to make his favorite party shot. The Texan told the story of the drink: It was created one night several years ago by a barman named Jeff at Emo's in Houston -- not to be confused with the bar's more famous location in Austin. Anyhoo, the Texan whistled, let's get down to business: two parts Crown Royal, two parts Seagram's 7, two parts Amaretto. Top it with a squirt of pineapple juice and shake it in a chilled mixer. Then serve it straight up. Then shoot it straight back. "Ooooweeee!" cried the Texan, expressing his approval. Ever since, the Skylark has been serving up round upon round of the tastiest shooters this side of the Bayou City. Ooooweeee!

Best margarita

Dixons Downtown Grill, Racines, Goodfriends

All three of the eponymously named joints owned variously by partners Lee Goodfriend, David Racine and Dixon Staples serve marvelous margs, elixirs that make it worth holding out until the end of the day. You'll start enjoying the night as you nip into a margarita, twelve ounces of a well-melded drink served in a martini glass with a shaker of the leftovers standing ready. Choose from the classics, such as the house, made from Sauza Gold blue agave tequila that's been hand-shaken with lime and triple sec, or the 1800 Grand, Cuervo 1800 with lime and Grand Marnier. But the unusual versions are worth checking out, too, because they're not the typical cutesy overkill. The jalapeo jelly version has a bite, and the ol' greyhound has its bark, too, courtesy of grapefruit juice. The drinks are ideal for pairing with Dixons savvy Southwestern fare, and at Goodfriends and Racines, there's no better way to pass some time at the bar than to sip a marg with a few friends.

Readers' choice: Rio Grande

Best margarita

Dixons Downtown Grill, Racines, Goodfriends

All three of the eponymously named joints owned variously by partners Lee Goodfriend, David Racine and Dixon Staples serve marvelous margs, elixirs that make it worth holding out until the end of the day. You'll start enjoying the night as you nip into a margarita, twelve ounces of a well-melded drink served in a martini glass with a shaker of the leftovers standing ready. Choose from the classics, such as the house, made from Sauza Gold blue agave tequila that's been hand-shaken with lime and triple sec, or the 1800 Grand, Cuervo 1800 with lime and Grand Marnier. But the unusual versions are worth checking out, too, because they're not the typical cutesy overkill. The jalapeño jelly version has a bite, and the ol' greyhound has its bark, too, courtesy of grapefruit juice. The drinks are ideal for pairing with Dixons savvy Southwestern fare, and at Goodfriends and Racines, there's no better way to pass some time at the bar than to sip a marg with a few friends.

Readers' choice: Rio Grande

Best chips and salsa

La Fabula

The innovative, jauntily decorated La Fabula has many things going for it, first and foremost a basket of warm, freshly fried, tri-color corn tortilla chips that comes with a trio of salsas, each interesting and addictive in its own right. There's the crunchy, cilantro-speckled salsa fresca, which starts out light but gets more appealing with each bite; the salsa roja, a potent, well-puréed blend of roasted tomatoes and peppers; and finally, the salsa verde, a tomatillo-based brew that contains a variety of chiles, including one that adds a nice touch of smoke without overpowering. This is the ideal starter to whet your appetite for some ambitious La Fabula dishes, so ideal that we'd gladly pay for it. But in a town where you're increasingly nickled and dimed for stale chips, what's truly remarkable about La Fabula's chips and salsa offering is that it's on the house. Yes, many of the best things in life are still free.

Readers' choice: Benny's

Best chips and salsa

La Fabula

The innovative, jauntily decorated La Fabula has many things going for it, first and foremost a basket of warm, freshly fried, tri-color corn tortilla chips that comes with a trio of salsas, each interesting and addictive in its own right. There's the crunchy, cilantro-speckled salsa fresca, which starts out light but gets more appealing with each bite; the salsa roja, a potent, well-puréed blend of roasted tomatoes and peppers; and finally, the salsa verde, a tomatillo-based brew that contains a variety of chiles, including one that adds a nice touch of smoke without overpowering. This is the ideal starter to whet your appetite for some ambitious La Fabula dishes, so ideal that we'd gladly pay for it. But in a town where you're increasingly nickled and dimed for stale chips, what's truly remarkable about La Fabula's chips and salsa offering is that it's on the house. Yes, many of the best things in life are still free.

Readers' choice: Benny's

Best breakfast burrito

Amigos Cafe

In the cold, gray light of dawn, when it seems nothing could make the cruel world look better, remember your friends. The Amigos Cafe cooks up wonderful breakfast burritos that are guaranteed to make you rise and shine. Well, rise and get the hell out of the house, anyway. Owners Laura and Santiago Cardenas came to Denver from Chihuahua, Mexico, and that country's loss is our gain. Santiago does the cooking in this cheerful little sidewalk space, making everything from scratch -- from the fiery salsa to the gorgeous green, a pork-studded gravy rife with jalapeos and tomatoes. That green is perfect for smothering a breakfast burrito, the best version of which includes a housemade chorizo, soft-scrambled eggs and skillfully hashed potatoes, chopped on the grill first to crisp up the edges. This is your wake-up call.

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