Ask a Stoner: Will THC Gummy Bears Show Up on Next Week's Drug Test ?

Dear Stoner: I recently made the mistake of eating a gummy bear with THC. I have not had any marijuana in years, but I have an upcoming drug test in seven days. Should I be concerned?
Tilly

Dear Tilly: Yes, Tilly, be concerned. Do hash and Haribos just taste the same to you? And who’s the asshole who tricked you into eating one? Address those two issues and you’ll probably never run into this dilemma again. I’ve had tons of idiot friends call me out of the blue, frantically asking if they were “good” after smoking a joint while in the Army or days before a random drug test, and I basically tell them all the same thing: It depends. It depends on your diet, your metabolism, the amount of THC you ingested, how you ingested it, how long since you last ingested THC and, most important, what sort of drug test it is. Drug tests that use hair or blood samples instead of urine or saliva can detect THC more accurately.

Eating marijuana can also make it last in your blood longer than smoking it would. Since you haven’t had marijuana in years and ingested a small amount, however, there’s a good chance that most of it should leave your system within four or five days, especially if you up the pace with lots of liquids ASAP. Cranberry juice, water and a good amount of sweating could do the trick; just make sure you continue to hydrate as you detoxify yourself.
Dear Stoner: Is it possible to sell edibles to dispensaries from New York City?
Kayla

Dear Kayla: Are you asking if you can sell Colorado-made edibles to dispensaries that are in New York City, or if you can sell edibles from New York City to Colorado dispensaries? Either way, the answer is the same: No. Until marijuana is legalized federally, you’d be smuggling drugs across state lines in the eyes of the feds, which is a big no-no if you ever want to be in the “legal” cannabis industry. For now, you’d need to apply for the appropriate licenses to operate a cannabis business in each individual state in order to sell edibles there — and you still couldn’t ship your own products state-to-state.

Have a question for our Stoner? E-mail [email protected] or call the potline at 303­-293­-2222.