Mighty 18 Wheeler

What I wouldn't give to be a greaser. The life's all about hot rods and hotter broads, pomade and pompadours. I've wanted to be a greaser since the first time I saw The Outsiders. Like my uncle used to say, though, I have "wavy hair" -- my one hair in...

By Dave Herrera

June 8, 2006

[
        {
          "name": "Air - MediumRectangle - Inline Content - Mobile Display Size",
          "component": "12017618",
          "insertPoint": "2",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "2"
        },{
          "name": "Editor Picks",
          "component": "17242653",
          "insertPoint": "4",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "1"
        },{
          "name": "Inline Links",
          "component": "18838239",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 8,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Air - MediumRectangle - Combo - Inline Content",
          "component": "17261320",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 8,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Inline Links",
          "component": "18838239",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 12,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Air - Leaderboard Tower - Combo - Inline Content",
          "component": "17261321",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 12,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        }
      ]

What I wouldn't give to be a greaser. The life's all about hot rods and hotter broads, pomade and pompadours. I've wanted to be a greaser since the first time I saw The Outsiders. Like my uncle used to say, though, I have "wavy hair" -- my one hair in the front waves to the one in the back -- and I don't have the gaunt frame that looks good in a tight white T-shirt and a pair of 501s. Truth is, I'm a bald fatass. Adding insult to injury, my old lady has a thing for greasers -- especially Elvis, whose face she has tattooed on her leg and whose picture is on her myspace page, along with the inscription "my man." Yes, sir, Sweetie's all about that retro shit. So you can bet your sweet ass I'm not taking her anywhere near the Hornet this Saturday, June 10, when the Mighty 18 Wheeler throws down. For one thing, I don't have a clue how to dance to the ferocious rockabilly those fellas churn out. And for another, well, I'm afraid that Jimmy "Slappindaddy" Kolodziej and his crew just might steal my best gal. In which case we'd have to rumble.

KEEP WESTWORD FREE... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we'd like to keep it that way. Your membership allows us to continue offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food, and culture with no paywalls. You can support us by joining as a member for as little as $1.