5. Alice Cooper - A Nightmare on Elm Street 6: Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare We understand that you probably didn't see this flick, because the sixth time is rarely the charm, but you should. Cooper plays Freddy's alcoholic, abusive stepfather, who adopts innocent little Freddy and then kicks the crap out of him until our future overachieving serial killer takes out his step-daddy with a razor. We suppose it makes sense that a pedophile and child killer would need someone to blame, and we like Cooper in this rotten role. And, to be honest, he's much more frightening without all of his make-up. Yikes.
4. Dee Snider - Strangeland Dee Snider not only appears in this 1998 horror fest (which was filmed in Colorado, incidentally), but he also wrote the thing. Double-whammy. He plays the character Captain Howdy/Carleton Hendricks who lures teenagers into his lair of torture by posing as a fellow student in chat rooms online. Snider's character is obsessed with marking the human body in various ways, including branding, scarification and tattooing. Which, except for the murder and all, doesn't sound all that bad. Anyway, in the end, Captain Howdy is freed and sent on his way to scar some other reckless teenagers. You know, for the sequel.
3. Tiffany - Mega Piranha In Mega Piranha ex-pop-star Tiffany plays the obvious role for her -- a scientist. No, we're not kidding. Apparently, when mutant, huge, angry piranhas attack Florida, only one woman can help. And that woman is '80s pop sensation Tiffany. We aren't sure how the crazed fish "escape" from the Amazon, but whatever. Mega-Piranha was released on DVD in 2010, and we doubt it sold a vast amount (available now on Amazon for $2.99), but we do want to give her a shout-out for trying to reboot her sorta famous status by doing bad horror movies and Playboy. Okay, we mostly thank her for Playboy.
2. David Bowie - The Hunger Based on a Knut Hamsun novel, this 1983 film not only had stars like Catherine Deneuve and Susan Sarandon, but Ziggy Stardust himself. Directed by Tony Scott, the Hunger features Bowie playing a crazed vampire (John Blaylock) whose life suddenly takes a tragic (and somewhat humorous) turn when he begins to age unexpectedly. Since we don't believe you should be forced to watch this... John falls down some stairs and dies. We aren't sure how a vampire can die by falling, but, hey, we aren't movie critics here. We're just trying to save you all some disappointment.
1. Meatloaf - The Rocky Horror Picture Show We know it's not really a horror film, but this cult-classic features a ton of weird and wicked goodness... including Meatloaf's minor but fabulous role. The 1975 film features Eddie, an ex-delivery boy with a love for music. Unfortunately, Eddie's part is quite short, as he's murdered by Dr. Frank-N-Furter. It's not that we admire The Loaf's amazing acting ability in the film, or that he can sing like a mofo... it's that we think it's just insanely cool he was in Rocky Horror Picture Show, and this awesomeness poses the question: What happened to you, Meat? Why are you now guest starring on Ghost Adventurers, and losing your shit on Celebrity Apprentice? Seriously, man, you're making Gary Busey look sane by comparison.
