Remember the pig heist of 2011, when a coalition of misfits from the Squeaky Bean swindled the prize pig mascot from Euclid Hall, who then returned the favor? That was all in good fun, but there seems to be something sinister in the recent pig-napping from Williams & Graham, the new speakeasy in Highland.
"Our beloved metal mascot, Buddy, was stolen from his post outside the Williams & Graham kitchen door in mid-December, right around our one-month anniversary" reveals David Bumgardener, the executive chef of Williams & Graham. "No one's given us any ransom letters as far as I know, so this may not be the 'good fun-style' pig-napping like Squeaky Bean vs. Euclid Hall."
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The brown brute, he adds, is "medium-size and weighs about sixty pounds, much like a 'real' pig his size, and he has the distinguishing features of a perpetual smile, despite the fact that his right ear is off, which we have, but it's just not the same."
"Buddy" was given to Bumgardner as a housewarming gift, and he'd appreciate it if the thug (or thugs) who swiped the swine would kindly return it to its rightful owner. "Any help you could lend us in locating him, or his kidnappers, would be greatly appreciated," pleads Bumgardner. "I'd like to say the reward would be the napper gets to keep his balls, but that may sound harsh."
If you happen to know where Buddy is being kept prisoner, let us know ASAP.