... and I've got nothing. No jokes. No snarky comments. What has the state of politics come to when the VPOTUS -- not exactly a man known as a tough target, not exactly a man who flies under the journalistic radar -- comes to my town and does absolutely fuck-all that's worth making fun of?
Seriously, Joe? No train stories? No discussions of hiding your loved ones in a bunker until every flu germ is eradicated? No open-mike F-bombs? You're killin' me, man. I've got a blog to fill, and all you can do is come to Denver, give a speech, eat some barbecue and act all vice-presidential without even once falling down the stairs or making fun of Indians or offering to leg-wrestle one of the dinosaurs in the Museum of Nature & Science "Prehistoric Journey" exhibit? Just think of all the ridiculous things you could've "accidentally" said while trying to pronounce the word diplodocus...
You missed your chance, Joe.
But at least Biden chose a historically good barbecue restaurant for his off-book catfish run. He rolled into M&D's yesterday afternoon, looking to get some 'cue in him and press a little flesh. And while M&D's is not one of my all-time favorites, it is a solidly good spot and has all the down-home, blue-collar savor that Biden seems to live on.
Had he gone to Brothers BBQ? Well, then I would've had something to complain about.
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SHOW ME HOW
At least Biden's visit to Mack and Daisy Shead's million-dollar barbecue shack reminded me of one other important thing: the cornbread at M&D's. Last week, I put together a list of all my favorite places in town to find the various fixings for a proper barbecue blow-out. This was inspired by the fact that, while eating at The Q, I was disappointed that I couldn't get any corn bread to go with my ribs. And while, on that list, I plugged in Jim 'n Nick's as my fave spot for cornbread (in muffin form), I forgot that M&D's has always had fantastic cornbread. Matter of fact, I think it's probably the best thing they do there -- especially once you get it home and, in the privacy of your own kitchen, slather it in butter and pop it in the microwave for a few seconds.
Something tells me, though, that Joe Biden probably wasn't wandering around his hotel suite last night in his underpants, plate of M&D's cornbread in one hand, stick of butter in the other, menacing Secret Service agents and demanding access to a microwave. And that's a shame, really. Because that would've made for a great story.
Maybe next time, huh, Joe?