Whether or not this is a shockingly discouraging testament to the page turners of America or Guy Fieri threatening to jam his back-ass headwords sunglasses down the throats of anyone who doesn't purchase his books, it's still a fact: Guy Fieri, who just dove into Denver with his "Culinary Road Show," now has the number one and number three slots on the New York Times best-seller list in the Paperback Advice category. Yes, you read that correctly: Guy Fieri's More Diners, Drive-ins and Dives is the best-selling advice paperback in the whole damn country, while the precursor to that fine prose, Diners, Drive-ins and Dives, is sitting pretty at the number two spot.
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What the hell is wrong with you people?