Denver Kink Field Guide

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Dominants

Description: Dominants are people of any gender or sexual orientation who exercise control in a power-exchange situation or relationship in either a scene/session dynamic or a relationship/lifestyle dynamic. Sexy, huh? Mistress Saskia, a professional Denver dominatrix and headmistress of Pavlovia Denver, and thirty-year-old "Daddy" are both dominants — but Daddy is referred to as a dom, in the masculine form, whereas Mistress Saskia is known as a dominatrix or the truncated feminine, domme. These titles are similar to the less specific terms "top" and "bottom," which denote a physical and situational title rather than an emotional or psychological dynamic." The terms "master" and "mistress" are dominant titles of respect and should be earned, as is the term "slave."

As Daddy explains: "We are in charge. Input is allowed and valued, but at the end of the day, we make the decision of which path to take. The dynamic has been discussed, evaluated and negotiated, where the submissive or slave wishes to not need to think about certain things and wishes to turn over full responsibility to the person they have chosen to have lead their life."

"I geek out on people. I find people fascinating, and I love to be part of somebody's exploration," Mistress Saskia says. "When people engage in something they are afraid of, they get through it feeling stronger and freer. That sounds counterintuitive when someone is submitting or bottoming, but when people are making themselves vulnerable, that takes an enormous amount of bravery. We love catharsis!"

Habitat Range: Inside the Sanctuary, the ones who have not yet mated gravitate toward the social area at the front of the club. Once mated, they migrate to the play area, where they and their submissive(s) proceed to make use of the indigenous equipment, such as racks, cages, crosses, spanking tables and padded benches.

Field Notes: The dominants are the rulers of the terrain, trusted to keep their packs in line and to protect their territory and sub-species counterparts. They can be monogamous or polyamorous, but tend not to play or roam together.

Here is our Field Guide to Denver's Wild Life. Pseudonyms are being used to protect the innocent, the guilty, and everyone in between. Illustrations by Mark Andresen. Words by Jenn Wohletz.

Read Jenn Wohletz's feature story: "Kink of the Jungle: A field guide to Denver's wild life."

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