All I Want for Christmas

With songs like "The Twelve Days of Christmas," "Silver Bells" and "Winter Wonderland" dancing through your head, aren't you ready for a silent night by the time New Year's kisses roll around? Lannie's Clocktower Cabaret, 1601 Arapahoe Street, has the answer for all you holiday humbuggers who would rather choke on a candy cane then endure another season of Bing Crosby.

Tonight starting at 8 p.m. and every Wednesday in November and December, Demented Divas: The Buttcracker will forever warp the way you think about the holiday season. According to David Westman, aka diva Nuclia Waste, "We listen to the same Christmas songs year after year. This is our way of taking them and turning them upside down and having fun with the holidays."

This two-part show starts with songs about what we really want for Christmas, like "One Night Stand" and "Stuck Up the Chimney" and then dashes on to spoof holiday favorites with "I Want a Boob Job for Christmas," "Walking 'Round in Women's Underwear" and "The Twelve Drinks of Christmas."

And just in case anyone feels left out, Waste promises that "all holidays and faiths will be equally skewered." Tickets are $15; for more information, go to
Wednesdays, 8 p.m. Starts: Nov. 7. Continues through Dec. 19, 2007

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Mark Dragotta