Celebrity Santas whose laps we fear to sit on

Aside for obvious problems with suspension of disbelief -- how are we going to pretend Chris "The Birdman" Andersen is Santa when we already know he's The Birdman? -- hiring a celebrity to play Kris Kringle can create a slew of dissonance and mildly disturbing associations, particularly if that celebrity has a, ahem, tarnished reputation (is that really snow on your beard, Santa?). Nevertheless, there are far creepier candidates to play Santa than little old drug-suspension Birdman. So in advance of his appearance as Santa at the J.W. Marriott on Sunday, we give you nine other celebrity laps we'd just as soon avoid.
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Jef Otte
Contact: Jef Otte