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Denver is a "Hotbed of Sex"

If you need more proof than just the general appearance of

Westword

's editorial staff that Denver is a sexy, sexy city, then look no further than

Men's Health

magazine, which

confirms this week what everybody already knows

: Denver loves the sex. We love the sex so much, in fact, that we came in at number five this week on the magazine's poll of coitus-loving cities -- meaning it's time to rally the troops, by God, because we used to be number one.

The magazine came to its conclusions using a number of factors, including condom sales, birth rates, sex toy sales and rates of STD infection -- the final category of which we're guessing inexplicably placed four other U.S. cities ahead of us (in order of their ranking): Austin, TX; Dallas, TX; Columbus, OH; and Durham, NC. Well, enjoy your chlamydia, Texas, because Denver's coming back.

See, just two short years ago, using extremely similar criteria, QualityHealth.com placed us at number one -- on a list that didn't even include Dallas or Austin, though it did place San Antonio at number four. Which leads us to believe that Men's Health's data may be corrupted in some way. Nevertheless, it's a slight we won't take lying down (or maybe we will, depending on where the mood takes us), because according to statistics, we're young, healthy, businesslike and drunk, and those are optimal conditions for copulation.

So grab a partner and let's get down to business -- and when we say business, we mean business -- because if there's one thing this town is about, it's about winning. And as of press time, we're still ranked number one in badass.

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